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Substance Abuse
Just sad, difficult child is not growing and I need to let go of thinking "it's a phase"
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<blockquote data-quote="Calamity Jane" data-source="post: 630351" data-attributes="member: 13882"><p>Ugh, he's just not LEARNING anything, Sig. Sometimes, when I would talk to difficult child at the height of our troubles, I'd just want to shake my head and say, "Who ARE you??" </p><p> </p><p>Is it a defense mechanism because he sees his brothers and his peers moving on in life? The contempt for his coworkers, in his current chosen occupation, by the way, is very disappointing, and I'm sure you didn't raise him that way. The probable dealing is problematic. He's become a risk taker in an occupation where risk does not lead to reward, at least, not for long. Perhaps he just keeps mentioning going back to school because he thinks it mollifies you in some way, that makes him more acceptable. I don't know if he has any intention of ever going back.</p><p> </p><p>You have already raised him, Sig, you've done your job. He seems to be a survivor, and nobody's fool. He sees this current job as a means to an end, but we know that there are folks who spend a lifetime working sh!%%* jobs and even those sh!%%8 jobs dry out when you can no longer pull your weight. It is a shame to have an intellect and squander it, but that's his gift to do what he wishes with it. He is on his own journey now, and the fact is, you can't save him and you can't stop him. That's frustrating and there's not a doggone thing you can do about it, but accept it. At least you and husband are on the same page. We're all in the same boat, in one degree or another. I know where you're coming from - ((((hugs)))).</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Calamity Jane, post: 630351, member: 13882"] Ugh, he's just not LEARNING anything, Sig. Sometimes, when I would talk to difficult child at the height of our troubles, I'd just want to shake my head and say, "Who ARE you??" Is it a defense mechanism because he sees his brothers and his peers moving on in life? The contempt for his coworkers, in his current chosen occupation, by the way, is very disappointing, and I'm sure you didn't raise him that way. The probable dealing is problematic. He's become a risk taker in an occupation where risk does not lead to reward, at least, not for long. Perhaps he just keeps mentioning going back to school because he thinks it mollifies you in some way, that makes him more acceptable. I don't know if he has any intention of ever going back. You have already raised him, Sig, you've done your job. He seems to be a survivor, and nobody's fool. He sees this current job as a means to an end, but we know that there are folks who spend a lifetime working sh!%%* jobs and even those sh!%%8 jobs dry out when you can no longer pull your weight. It is a shame to have an intellect and squander it, but that's his gift to do what he wishes with it. He is on his own journey now, and the fact is, you can't save him and you can't stop him. That's frustrating and there's not a doggone thing you can do about it, but accept it. At least you and husband are on the same page. We're all in the same boat, in one degree or another. I know where you're coming from - ((((hugs)))). [/QUOTE]
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Just sad, difficult child is not growing and I need to let go of thinking "it's a phase"
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