just shaking my head at all this


New Member
i really am. lol. my god it just never ends. get difficult child eating and now easy child is having huge issues.

tonight difficult child had hw to do for tmrw tutors after pyschiatrist appointment. gotta try to find another medication.

difficult child sat with-hw for a long time super defiant lately. she wanted to watch a show at 8:30 and i told her you have to complete at least some of the hw to watch it. she walekd around, put it off, kept doing other stuff i kept giving her countdown.

so, show came on hw wasn't done. she blew. shoved dining room table into wall, started freaking out tossing books, screaming yelling hysterical crying. walking thru house hitting walls stomping feet.i took easy child and said go watch tv in my rm.

so after 30 minutes i calmed her down and got her to sit down and get 2 more pages done than told her if you do you can watch it.

while i'm working on her a car pulls up in driveway and i go to easy child and say whose that? she says my friends i'm going for a drive. wow!

all i could think is your saying you want to kill yourself, walking around crying a mess and now you want to go out in pouring rain with some freinds i dont' know.

so i had to tell her no. i told her i love you so much yet being out in pouring rain isnt' something i can let you do right now, let's go to dr tmrw let him meet with-you see what he thinks see if he prescribes an anti depressant get therapy going in a very short time you can run again. i just can't let you go out knowing that you don't want to be alive anymore.

i lucked out with-her she didnt' fight me just cried and said how long do i have to go thru this? i said till your level again.

i have to admit i have stayed so calm lately. i dont know why or what it is maybe i'm numb i'm not sure. yet i handle all these explosive chaotic situations well.
i told husband though it's really hard with you not here with-all of this. hes' gotta work though.

difficult child's kept us up till 4 a.m. past week. screaming at the top of her lungs. last night she was up till 7 a.m. we gave her my easy child because we just couldn't take the screaming anymore.

i really really hope doctor can help both of them tmrw. i do believe with easy child it'll just take the medications some therapy to work thru her issues and she'll return to easy child.

thx if you read this was long just had to vent


Hopefully today will be better. You really have your hands full!



(((Jena))) Nothing to add, I think you're on the right track and doing everything you can. I just pray that you find the right help. And remember to breath and take care of mom. Visualize the air mask going on you first... love you,