Just talked to SpEd Director

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Shari, Mar 11, 2009.

  1. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    I told her I knew what was going on shouldn't be, but I didn't want to make it impossible to work with them, either, so I was seeking her direction and input.

    She was NOT aware of the details surrounding difficult child's half-day placement. She asked for them all.

    She really liked it (sarcasm) when I told her that I was given the option of half days or not going to school there when I pushed back to the principal that I didn't agree with it.

    She agrees this should have been a team decision; it will be going forward. She now knows the extent we went to getting the guns out of our house after the first threat, and said further threats should be ignored; wasn't impressed when I said his second suspension was for exactly that. They also told her that difficult child broke the skin when he "stabbed" the para with the scissors. I told her I did not think so, if it did, nothing was said or done about it while I was in the room. In fact, the para walked across the room and told another person in the room "he tried to stab me with the scissors". I'd think if he actually made her bleed that she'd have said "he stabbed me".

    She was trying to get the IEP meeting scheduled while we were still on the phone, so principal will have no doubts going forward that the team will be involved.

    She agrees we need to have a plan, not just principal's discretion. And that plan should include addressing the para that difficult child doesn't work well with, more so than just "outside training". There will need to be supports in place for the both of them when he first returns. She agrees.

    So, while nothing earth shattering is going to happen right now because of this conversation, I think it was a productive one. She's pushing the IEP thru so we, as a team, can start getting plans in place to bring difficult child back to full days and the decisions can be made by a team and not just principal.
  2. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Sounds like you've got a good ally in this campaign to get the IEP sorted out properly for difficult child. It's about time somebody took responsibility for following protocol and doing things by the book instead of by the whim of whomever is paying attention at the time.

    Things will get better. You are on the right path!
  3. jal

    jal Member

    That's good news Shari. You definately need the full team to go ahead. My difficult child's team in Kindergarten consisted of the Special Education Director for the District, the principal, difficult child's teacher, sped teacher, nurse, Occupational Therapist (OT), husband, myself and his 2 daycare providers. Now in the new school we have the Special Education Director of our home district, difficult child's teacher, school therapist, husband, myself, our two in home therapists, Occupational Therapist (OT) and the Director of the program he attends.

    When everyone is on the same page it is so much better. Good luck!
  4. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Make sure you keep pushing them about specifics of incidents and get some of this in writing if you can- like the tteacher's statement about what really happened. This kind of stuff has gotten out of hand with my son's teacher's on a few occassions in the past. Particualrly, one last year where an email was sent to me saying that difficult child was horsing around in art class and ended up cutting a piece out of his friend's art project instead of his own. (They were cutting shapes out of construction paper and difficult child's best friend was sitting beside him and their projects ended up being overlapped) Ok, fine- I backed up him getting a reprimand for horsing around with scissors in his hand and not paying attention to what he was doing.

    What got emailed to the iep team and put in difficult child's file?? The same teacher then submitted a statement that was not copied to me and it said that difficult child "slashed another student's artwork with his scissors". I have more stories like this but I will spare you.
  5. SRL

    SRL Active Member

    Keep in mind, directors of Special Education can come to the IEP team meetings.

    Also, outside neutral consultants in specific fields (such as Autism, behavioral, etc,) can be brought in at district expense when other options aren't working.

    Our district volunteered both of these--I didn't even request it.
  6. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    I am going to ask the para if difficult child cut her when he "stabbed" her. Just cause I'm curious. I will probably ask for a copy of the incident from his file, too, but I will wait til things die down a bit - but that's something I have been doing and plan to continue, asking for a written (prefer email) copy of the incidents. If para was cut, no one addressed it while I was in the room, and it would be VERY interesting if cutting had been reported but didn't happen.

    I also know, from having them send me incidents after the fact, that the threat that caused the first suspension came about after he was pulled out from under a desk he was trying to hide under.

    Even SpEd Director this morning remembered from our very first meeting that the A-Number 1 Rule for dealing with difficult child is "if he hides, LEAVE HIM ALONE". Twice now that I know of he has escalated because that was not followed.
  7. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    It sounds like you have a great ally in the Sp Ed Dir. I am glad. It should help eliminate problems with the principal.

    I think getting copies of the incident report in writing are excellent. If you are on hand for any future things like the "stabbing", take a photo with your phone if you can. A picture of where he stabbed her (or didn't!) could be an excellent tool in difficult child's favor.

    I always forget stuff like that in the moment, but if you can remember it could be handy. It is one of the reasons I won't ahve a phone with-o a camera.

    Hugs to you and wee difficult child!