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Just wondering, Have any of you....
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<blockquote data-quote="OTE" data-source="post: 9424"><p>In terms of real therapeutic placements mine has probably been through 4 or 5 now, two for a period of time and others a couple of months or less. Other placements, hospitalizations, jails, shelters,....8 or 10 off the top of my head. All in the last 4 yrs. I figure he's been at home about a total of 6 months of the last 4 yrs. Most every place he got booted out for lousy behavior, danger to other kids, etc, etc.</p><p></p><p>Do I think any ONE placement changed him? NO. But he has improved over the years. He can identify emotions now. So he has some recognition in advance of imminent loss of control. He also has some tools now to deal with that. So the explosions are MUCH less frequent and non-violent for the most part. Has he complied with any rules? Not much. He's currently a sqatter in my house because he just turned 17 and I'm not allowed to kick him out. He ran away from the Fall placement and is refusing to go into another. He's not going to school, not got a job (which working permit he can't get without going to school), comes home in the middle of the night, steals money from my purse and his brothers, refuses any kind of therapy or medication, etc. But, yes, overall he's better. He's also an addict and actively using. Again, so far not as much as before but I'm still waiting for the other shoe to drop. With all that, at least one psychiatrist in every place, he still has no real diagnosis other than the obvious CD, ODD and sub abuse.</p><p></p><p>Personally I have come to accept over the years that mine is like every other addict. He will change when he wants to. I can only pray that is sooner rather than later. The stats say that the more treatment they are in for the longer the period the better the chances that they will someday give it up. So mine had the better part of 4 yrs in some kind of treatment. Frankly, just keeping him alive this long is some kind of miracle. But hopefully, in addition to keeping him alive, I've increased his odds of someday turning around. I think he's certainly got all the knowledge in his head of how to do it, from who to call for help to how hard it's going to be.</p><p></p><p>I can say that the last jail stay seems to have kept him from selling drugs or committing other crimes. He's been very clear to me any number of times that he intends to not commit any crime because he never wants to go back to jail. The difference the last time I think was two fold. First, he was in big boy jail.... the part of the adult jail where they keep 16 and 17 yr olds. He was not coddled as he had been in juvie. There was no series of guards looking out for him, separating him from the sociopaths, psychotics and so forth. This time he was just one of them. They screamed all night so he could never sleep. They gave him a tray of horrible food period, no sneaking treats to him or giving him more of one thing and less of another if he didn't like it. Mind you, it's not like he had it bad there. It just wasn't his own cell separated from the teenage murderers, rapists and so forth. second, maybe this time, what the other prior guards had told him got through, that he isn't like them and doesn't belong there. Am I foolish enough to think that will permanently change him? No, he's an addict. If he uses enough he will do anything for money for drugs. It's a hugely steep downhill slope for him.</p><p></p><p>But yes, I do think all the residential placements have helped my kid.</p><p></p><p>Sara, I can assure you that the first time mine was in the hospital I was treated exactly the same way. I refused to accept blame and refused to bring him home. By the third week they pretty much labeled him a sociopath and signed him up for Residential Treatment Center (RTC). EVERY placement after that, despite years and years of placements makes me go through the whole thing again....to prove that I'm not the lousy parent that they think is the cause of ODD. The difference between psychiatry and psychology... I am just not fond of psychologists in general...my own bitterness. LOL Oh, and every placement will tell me that he needs to go into another Residential Treatment Center (RTC), shouldn't go home, but they'll write up a report that says he should go to a lower level placement... even had one write should go home. LOL. Unless you have a tape recorder going when they tell you he's not suitable to live with a family...prove it! Another bitterness.. LOL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="OTE, post: 9424"] In terms of real therapeutic placements mine has probably been through 4 or 5 now, two for a period of time and others a couple of months or less. Other placements, hospitalizations, jails, shelters,....8 or 10 off the top of my head. All in the last 4 yrs. I figure he's been at home about a total of 6 months of the last 4 yrs. Most every place he got booted out for lousy behavior, danger to other kids, etc, etc. Do I think any ONE placement changed him? NO. But he has improved over the years. He can identify emotions now. So he has some recognition in advance of imminent loss of control. He also has some tools now to deal with that. So the explosions are MUCH less frequent and non-violent for the most part. Has he complied with any rules? Not much. He's currently a sqatter in my house because he just turned 17 and I'm not allowed to kick him out. He ran away from the Fall placement and is refusing to go into another. He's not going to school, not got a job (which working permit he can't get without going to school), comes home in the middle of the night, steals money from my purse and his brothers, refuses any kind of therapy or medication, etc. But, yes, overall he's better. He's also an addict and actively using. Again, so far not as much as before but I'm still waiting for the other shoe to drop. With all that, at least one psychiatrist in every place, he still has no real diagnosis other than the obvious CD, ODD and sub abuse. Personally I have come to accept over the years that mine is like every other addict. He will change when he wants to. I can only pray that is sooner rather than later. The stats say that the more treatment they are in for the longer the period the better the chances that they will someday give it up. So mine had the better part of 4 yrs in some kind of treatment. Frankly, just keeping him alive this long is some kind of miracle. But hopefully, in addition to keeping him alive, I've increased his odds of someday turning around. I think he's certainly got all the knowledge in his head of how to do it, from who to call for help to how hard it's going to be. I can say that the last jail stay seems to have kept him from selling drugs or committing other crimes. He's been very clear to me any number of times that he intends to not commit any crime because he never wants to go back to jail. The difference the last time I think was two fold. First, he was in big boy jail.... the part of the adult jail where they keep 16 and 17 yr olds. He was not coddled as he had been in juvie. There was no series of guards looking out for him, separating him from the sociopaths, psychotics and so forth. This time he was just one of them. They screamed all night so he could never sleep. They gave him a tray of horrible food period, no sneaking treats to him or giving him more of one thing and less of another if he didn't like it. Mind you, it's not like he had it bad there. It just wasn't his own cell separated from the teenage murderers, rapists and so forth. second, maybe this time, what the other prior guards had told him got through, that he isn't like them and doesn't belong there. Am I foolish enough to think that will permanently change him? No, he's an addict. If he uses enough he will do anything for money for drugs. It's a hugely steep downhill slope for him. But yes, I do think all the residential placements have helped my kid. Sara, I can assure you that the first time mine was in the hospital I was treated exactly the same way. I refused to accept blame and refused to bring him home. By the third week they pretty much labeled him a sociopath and signed him up for Residential Treatment Center (RTC). EVERY placement after that, despite years and years of placements makes me go through the whole thing again....to prove that I'm not the lousy parent that they think is the cause of ODD. The difference between psychiatry and psychology... I am just not fond of psychologists in general...my own bitterness. LOL Oh, and every placement will tell me that he needs to go into another Residential Treatment Center (RTC), shouldn't go home, but they'll write up a report that says he should go to a lower level placement... even had one write should go home. LOL. Unless you have a tape recorder going when they tell you he's not suitable to live with a family...prove it! Another bitterness.. LOL [/QUOTE]
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