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Just wondering, Have any of you....
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<blockquote data-quote="rejectedmom" data-source="post: 9440" data-attributes="member: 2315"><p>So far for us nothing has really worked. There were some short term improvements but they never lasted. husband ad I feel the outcome wold be the same if we had done nothing other than educate our difficult child. difficult child was in early intervention at age 2, He had an IEP that stayed with him throughout school. We had summer tutors so he didn't slide backwards. We put him in a private school for ADHD kids at the middle school level to prevent him from the effects of a perilous journey through teen years in a public school system. He has had all kinds of medications, Psycotherapy, Behavior modification therapy, and EMDR. He was sent to a magnet school for learning and behavior problems after a month back in public HS. He brought a toy gun to school and though he didn't take it out of his book bag he showed it to someone who reported him. They invoked the "look Alike" law and that was how difficult child first ended up in the legal system. The school suspended him for a full year and he was sent to the magnant facility. I think it was harsh for that particular event but difficult child had done much that he had not been caught at and the School was so perfect for his kind of problems that we didn't fight the placement. Truly if difficult child had not gone there he most likely would not have earned a diploma. outside of school we did Boy Scouts, Church youth group, sent him to windsurfing camp, computer camp, sailing camp (different on each summmer through Middle school and HS since he was an outcst in the neighborhood) for social development. He stole from the family almost his entire life. nothing we did could stop him from taking anything he wanted. He broke locks off our doors so it was not that he didn't know he was not allowed to take our things. He once told me he liked being sneaky. When he neared the end of HS he started his slide (we later learned this is when he started using pot and alcohol). When he reached 18 he was uncontrollable. He did a series of petty crimes and then acted as a lookout in a robbery. while waiting for his court date he continued to use and became very abusive and defiant. He had three visits to hospital Psyc wards for depression and rages. it culminated with his physical attack on me. After a brief stay in prison, we (with the blessing of the court) sent him to an Residential Treatment Center (RTC). difficult child walked away from it even though he was doing well after only 2 months. He was taken back into custody and is serving an 18 month sentance which he can reduce to 4 months if he does their early release program. difficult child has bee thrown out of that program twice and in an effort to gain sympathy and control made a few superficial cuts on his wrists right before Christmas. We think he may have don this so we would spend more of our recouses in trying to get him out again. </p><p></p><p>So far the only real accomplishment we see after all our efforts is thqt difficult child earned a HS diploma. </p><p></p><p> I agree that nothing helps unless they have the desire and the ability to help themselves. We have no way of knowing if they have that until we try to help them over and over again. -RM</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="rejectedmom, post: 9440, member: 2315"] So far for us nothing has really worked. There were some short term improvements but they never lasted. husband ad I feel the outcome wold be the same if we had done nothing other than educate our difficult child. difficult child was in early intervention at age 2, He had an IEP that stayed with him throughout school. We had summer tutors so he didn't slide backwards. We put him in a private school for ADHD kids at the middle school level to prevent him from the effects of a perilous journey through teen years in a public school system. He has had all kinds of medications, Psycotherapy, Behavior modification therapy, and EMDR. He was sent to a magnet school for learning and behavior problems after a month back in public HS. He brought a toy gun to school and though he didn't take it out of his book bag he showed it to someone who reported him. They invoked the "look Alike" law and that was how difficult child first ended up in the legal system. The school suspended him for a full year and he was sent to the magnant facility. I think it was harsh for that particular event but difficult child had done much that he had not been caught at and the School was so perfect for his kind of problems that we didn't fight the placement. Truly if difficult child had not gone there he most likely would not have earned a diploma. outside of school we did Boy Scouts, Church youth group, sent him to windsurfing camp, computer camp, sailing camp (different on each summmer through Middle school and HS since he was an outcst in the neighborhood) for social development. He stole from the family almost his entire life. nothing we did could stop him from taking anything he wanted. He broke locks off our doors so it was not that he didn't know he was not allowed to take our things. He once told me he liked being sneaky. When he neared the end of HS he started his slide (we later learned this is when he started using pot and alcohol). When he reached 18 he was uncontrollable. He did a series of petty crimes and then acted as a lookout in a robbery. while waiting for his court date he continued to use and became very abusive and defiant. He had three visits to hospital Psyc wards for depression and rages. it culminated with his physical attack on me. After a brief stay in prison, we (with the blessing of the court) sent him to an Residential Treatment Center (RTC). difficult child walked away from it even though he was doing well after only 2 months. He was taken back into custody and is serving an 18 month sentance which he can reduce to 4 months if he does their early release program. difficult child has bee thrown out of that program twice and in an effort to gain sympathy and control made a few superficial cuts on his wrists right before Christmas. We think he may have don this so we would spend more of our recouses in trying to get him out again. So far the only real accomplishment we see after all our efforts is thqt difficult child earned a HS diploma. I agree that nothing helps unless they have the desire and the ability to help themselves. We have no way of knowing if they have that until we try to help them over and over again. -RM [/QUOTE]
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