That wasn't an explosion you heard. That was me screaming for the second time today. Only this time I screamed, "GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!!" easy child came home and told me that he got mad at me earlier because I closed out what he had open on the computer. I didn't touch his computer and told him so. And even if I had, it didn't warrant his outburst. Plus, he never mentioned that earlier. He was too busy yelling at me about moving the car or whatever else it was. Cause I'm still not sure. Oh, wait, I know. It's because apparently difficult child had yelled at him to move his car and so he has to yell at me. I told him that he is almost 18, she is 14 and they are both old enough to be responsible for their own relationship. Well, I was/am still upset and told him so. It's been happening way too often and I'm not having it anymore. So, of course, he's mad because I'm not over it. He is, so everyone else should be, too. And as it was continuing to go on, I was not getting over it anytime soon. I. don't. feel. good. I am on heavy duty pain medications today. I don't even know how much of this I'll remember tomorrow. I'm not in the mood, ya know? difficult child and her PCA came home during this. easy child said that I'm mad at him all the time. Ummm....no. I'm actually rarely mad at him. I get frustrated. Who wouldn't. And I rarely stay mad. Then difficult child pipes in that "actually, Mom, you are". It took all of my self-control. The PCA looked at difficult child and did the hand across the neck thing to tell her to knock it off. If you were to listen to difficult child, I'm mad at her all the time, too. Neither is true. So, easy child who was mad at difficult child to begin with now has an ally. When she said that, I told them they could both get away frome me. The PCA grabbed difficult child's arm and pulled her into the kitchen. easy child continued. It was just circular argument/reasoning/logic. I don't even know. It was like he was taking pages out of difficult child's playbook. I know I was sitting there for the second time today thinking how surreal all this is. And I know it's not just the pain medications. I mean, this went on for almost an hour. I finally walked away from easy child to go outside and found difficult child crying in the kitchen. PCA was on the computer. I asked difficult child why she was crying and she said something about the way I treat them all the time. You know, I just felt kinda numb. I am soooooooooooo beyond sick of it. I looked at her and was just kinda incredulous. I said, "The way I treat you guys? What about the way you two treat me? It's always me, me, me, me, me, me, me." And I went outside. When I came back in difficult child was in her room. PCA said, "Hi beautiful", and I just looked at her. She asked, "That's not going to work, is it?" Ummm...no. Then, from the living room Devon said, "No, Mom. You always make it all about you. How you feel, what you want, what you need." That's when I screamed for the second time today. PCA said he just needed smacked. I just looked at her. She said, well, they both do. I said, "Uh, yeah." She asked me to try not to kill anyone tonight. I told her I wasn't making promises. easy child was leaving and PCA told him she was going, too, cause she had to move her car. He slammed the front door closed in her face. Oh, and easy child says he's tired of me pressuring him about school. He was supposed to start last week and he didn't. They left a message Thursday that if he didn't go today (Monday) that he wouldn't be able to participate in the program. So, I told him last night that he really needs to go today or he wouldn't get to do it. That was pressuring him. He's stressed about school and work. He works part time and goes to school part time. Man. He has it tough.