Keeping my nose out of it

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by toughlovin, Jul 20, 2011.

  1. toughlovin

    toughlovin Guest

    Hi all... Just writing here to help me keep my nose out of my sons business as it were. He texted me this morning asking me to unblock his exgfs number from his phone. I said ok and kept my mouth shut... but while on the phone website I noticed that he has a call to the police and a call to his work.

    So my imagination starts running... is he in trouble again? Is he calling in sick to work? Will he lose his job? What is going on with the ex??

    I so want to ask him... or er interrogate him. I know know know that I need to keep my mouth shut and say and ask nothing. Our relationship is improving and it won't if he thinks I am snooping or asking too many questions.

    I need to stay strong and lost my curiosity. What will be will be.
  2. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I know how you feel. Its probably innocent. Maybe he saw an accident and called to report it like a good citizen. I keep attempting to instill that sense of civic responsibility in
  3. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    Can understand this being difficult but it sounds like you know that you need to lay low and not say anything.
    Everytime I see my oldest difficult child I want to ask him "Are you still is that going?" But I don't...I wait for him to volunteer info to me.

    Hopefully the phone calls are nothing to be concerned about.
    Thinking of you,
  4. dashcat

    dashcat Member

    I know how hard this is. I stopped asking my difficult child any question that gave her an opportunity to lie to me quite some time ago. EX, insead of "what did you do this weekend?" I will say "How are you doing?" or "What's new?" It's not perfect and I'm far from perfect at it, but I keep trying

    As you know from a recent thread of inine, I had access to quite a bit of information about her without her knowledge. Accessing this information was not helping her and it was hurting me in a big way. I stopped looking, but it is a huge struggle and a huge temptation every day.

    What it boils down to is a questio of whether or not asking him will help him/you When it won't - as hard has it is - it's best to keep silent. Hang in there. You're not alone.
  5. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    I avoid questions with katie as well. It's simply better that way. It reduces the amt of lies I have to listen to.... And I then don't get asked to help in a situation where I don't want to help.

    In general though, with easy child and difficult children alike........for the most part ignorance is bliss. Sometimes there are things you are just better off NOT knowing.