klmno? What's your plan?

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by DDD, Nov 29, 2009.

  1. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I assume you haven't heard from HI yet. Seems like you're trying to stay chilled which is terrific. Have you set a time when you are going to call or email them for an update. Just curious as I was thinking about you today.
  2. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    Me as well, I keep waiting, nervous energy! LOL
  3. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    My plan is to find a payable job ASAP somewhere closer to this area- but not this area- and hope like hades that I can find a way to survive on the pay.

    I emailed the security officer last Mon but didn't get a response so I assumed he took the week off. I emailed the HR person on Tues asking if the clearance had gone thru and a decision made, or if she knew yet when a fenal decision would be made. She emailed back and didn't answer any of those questions- she just said her super was reviewing my file and she'd let me know if they needed anything else. I'd already been told that they had everything they needed. Anyway, that might mean that the security officer is finished and now the HR person just needs to sign off on it to finalize it.

    Still, the fact that I obviously can't count on anything the Department of Juvenile Justice people or PO says, right now I'm leaning toward not going even if they offer me the job. It just seems to risky to go when I'm not confident that difficult child will be able to go with me or even come after he's released. I have promised difficult child that I will try talking to these people and PO one more time if I get the job confirmed and that I will not tell HI a final decision until I talk to difficult child first, but right now, that's how I'm leaning. I just havve too much of a leary feeling that if difficult child doesn't get to go when I do, he would never be able to- this state would not release him to me.

    Soooooo.....we'll see. I'll give a last ditcfh effort and shoot for waiting as long as I can to see if that makes a difference. Oh- I did get a letter from the Department of Juvenile Justice director this week- I updated about that on my last thread on General a couple of days ago.

    I'm off to see difficult child now and go to the store- I'll be back on this evening.

    Have a good day and thanks for thinking of me!

    Sorry for all the misspelled words- I'm in a hurry!
  4. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Geez, Louise. Maybe the Dude took off for a long TDay weekend and that is why you haven't heard back. I hope so. I really can not imagine that any State would want to add a kid to it's rolls. There is just too much pressure to cut costs for them to lust after another dependent, in my humble opinion. DDD
  5. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Well, difficult child is already a dependent of the state- except for the CS I'm currently paying.

    I agree with you though. I have a theory on how they handle "delinquents". Their (county and state Department of Juvenile Justice) first priority is funding, especially with the current economic crisis. Their second priority is keeping control of the kid. I really don't think they send kids back to families because they think this is in the best interest of the child- not saying it's not, just that I don't think they think it- and I don't think they give a rat's hiney about what is in the best interest of anybody anyway. I think they do it because it keeps them from having to foot the bill for the continuous upkeep of the child AND it allows them control of the child and family. If the child is placed in a group home for instance, they cannot tell the group home what rules to have and they can't hold the group home accountable in court if the kid gets in trouble again and they can't make the group home pay restitution, etc.

    So why then do you think I'm worried about them not releasing difficult child to me? because difficult child is a ward of this state and HI is pretty far away. If something went wrong with the plan of difficult child going there, the people in Department of Juvenile Justice here have to figure out how to get difficult child back here- that's a lot easier to do if difficult child stays in this region- even if he's not in this state. (IT took me a while to get the concept, but now I do- when a person is on probation or parole, they are still under Department of Juvenile Justice authority- as in, Department of Juvenile Justice still has control of them and can order whatever they want- they are just being released from incaceration and allowed to live somewhere else. For some weird reason, if a kid lives with the parent, they have jsut as much authority over the parent. If the kid doesn't live with a parent, they only have authority over the kid.)) But moreso- the GAL has an obvious real issue against me and is biased toward my bro. Between her expressed blame of me for difficult child's issues, Department of Juvenile Justice wanting difficult child to go to a family, but the need for the county to maintain monitoring/control- it's my guess that someone would call a hearing with dss there, I wouldn't be able to get back to attend, difficult child woulld be turned over to dss and thus- go to my bro.

    They can't just give custody to someone else without a hearing or dss involvement but it wouldn't be that hard for these whackos to "make a mistake" or miscommunicate and give 2 weeks notice of difficult child's release, me not be able to make it, so in their mind, they are "forced" to turn difficult child over to dss and the judge has no grounds to intervene because I am not in the court room.

    I'm sure that sounds like paranoia, but I have seen how the people here "work" for several years now.

    If, by chance, they did decide to release difficult child but put him in a group home because maybe it's cheaper than incarceration (I'm not sure on that), I wouldn't even be able to afford to visit him if I'm in HI. If I'm in a nearby state, I can make some visits and get to court and they have basicly no justification for not releasing difficult child to me at the appropriate time. Except of course that this scenario requires me finding a job and home somewhere close enough to make this happen. They know all this is at stake- but notice how the PO isn't really trying to make the HI thing happen- and Department of Juvenile Justice is in control of difficult child so that's it- if I can get them to commit to difficult child being released in late Jan or early Feb and I can wait that long, it would be harder for them to justify not releasing him to me. Still, even though he's released to me- he (and then I) wiould still be under Department of Juvenile Justice control as long as difficult child is on parole.

    Have I mentioned how I feel about the system and having 20-some year olds tell me how to raise my kid??
    Last edited: Nov 29, 2009
  6. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I'm hoping this week brings some resolution. It is a bummer! DDD
  7. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I hope you hear some good news. I thought when they transferred probation or parole, it was completely transferred to the new state. Thats the way it happens down here.
  8. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Good morning! I hope something happens today or tomorrow, too. At least, if the job comes thru the Department of Juvenile Justice people here would know I didn't make all this up to try to get difficult child released early. I think they do beleive me but GAL won't if she catches wind of this- and she might already be involved- PO might have talked to her since they are in the same building quite often.

    Janet, it transfers to the new state after the interstate study and if the new state accepts the difficult child. That process takes about 3 months, and can't be started until the parent is there. This is why it makes everyone's (except mine and difficult child's) life easier for me to go before difficult child.

    However, it still can be done after difficult child's release just like any time a parent moves and has a child living at home. But, the risk to this state is that if by chance we got to HI and both states took the months to go thru this, but then didn't accept difficult child, this state has the problem of what to do. i was told that they doubt very sseriously that would happen because in spite of it all, difficult child is not classified violent, they know I'm not a drug dealer and have always kept him in a decent home. And the CM told me the PO said if it did happen, they probably would just release difficult child from parole. This is where my frustration lies- the WHY not go ahead and help make this happen?

    Anyway- the way it has been worded to mee is that the interstate study is to make sure the new state "agrees to monitor the child for the state having authority". I tend to think it never becomes an issue again with the old state if acceptance is gotten in the new state because if the child reoffends while on parole in the new state, it's an offense against the new state and will be punished there.

    The real point I had tried to make earlier though is just like the Department of Juvenile Justice people make all decisions for ggfg while he's incarcerated, they still have that same authority over him after he's releaased- kind of like they have parental authority- over him as long as he's on parole. They can get difficult child placed wherever they want and they know all they have to do is get dss to pick up the phone and my bro would be here within two days ready to take difficult child. And of course, it's a real thorn in my side that if he lives with me, they have that autority of me because I'm a parent. But they have no authority over me (except for CS) or staff of any place he's living if he doesn't live with me.
    Last edited: Nov 30, 2009
  9. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Well, then in reality, the main problem is just in getting him out there if you get the job if they dont release him in time to go with you.

    I would continue to hope for the job in HI, look for jobs in surrounding locales, and then if the job (whatever job it is) comes through...submit your information as soon as you have it for the latest date you have to be in your new location (fudge it a bit) and tell them you would like him released to go with you. If it is anywhere near his time of release, Im betting that given his good record that they may work with you. After all, it is already December. He is due out in Feb. If you can push this into mid January, that is not that early.
  10. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    I agree- but the latest news was that Department of Juvenile Justice needed something from PO proving the intent for us to move to HI in order to justify Department of Juvenile Justice going to the higher committee to ask for an early release. (I agree that makes sense). But, PO said that he couldn't fill out the interstate study paperwork until I had moved. Again, I understand that. My position though is that PO should be able to put something in writing (once the job is confirmed and I prove it) stating that he's aware of the situation and prepared and willing to do that paperwork if difficult child is released early. He told me that verbally, but apparently did not back that up to the CM. What he told CM, according to her, is that they would NOT let difficult child get a direct release, that they were very concerned over difficult child's offense against me (BS- they're convinced I drove difficult child to it)), and wanted me to go to HI first, then they would decide what to do with difficult child upon his release and that a group home was discussed as an option.

    IOW, PO told me he was ok with difficult child moving to HI with me, but according to CM, PO has not committed to that and they are "discussing" whether or not to hold difficult child in this state or what to do with him if I move to HI. Well, there's no way I'm moving that far away with this up in the air and me obviously being told one thing to my face, but it not being backed up and other things said to other people. Again- it's par for the course with people in this county.
    Last edited: Nov 30, 2009