A few years back I was in the midst of a horrible time with my daughter. I went to a party and could not contain myself about how awful my daughter was acting, I confinded in a woman that I thought was compassionate but instead she told me I must of been the problem to talk so harshly about my own daughter. I felt shamed and embarrassed and even more grieved on a deeper level. Flash forward a few years and I ran into this same woman, she looked thin and very sad, she walked up to me, hugged me and I could tell she felt very bad for how she treated me in the midst of my grief. She confinded in me that her daughter turned bad and decided to not have anything to do with her and has not talked to her in 3 years. I think she genuinely felt awful for treating me bad when I was in the midst of my agony. Even if I never experienced a bad situation and someone was telling me about it, I would never think of attacking them or making them feel worse, it is not hard to be a compassionate listener. I have a few friends that struggle with their kids and I see the struggle on their faces, bodies and how they walk. My son's death has tore me into a billion pieces and it hurts all the time but it does not hurt as much as my daughter's grief, I have to watch an intelligent beautiful woman make the most stupid decisions on a regular basis. My daughter is a degreed person and one step from being homeless. I guess she can live at her fancy spa but I have no idea how much longer that will be open. My daughter's teachers used to call me and tell me what an outstanding young woman she was and how they know she will be someone great someday, my dad and mom thought she was brilliant and so proud or what an outstanding young woman she was. She was the apple in my dad's eye, the only grandchild he was truly proud of. I remember one of her former boyfriends would say 'Does she not care that her brother and granddad's spirits can see her do these awful things? I guess what I am saying is that when I saw her full potential and see her now it busts my heart in a trillion pieces.. I know this is HER journey, not mine but such a waste of precious life, a life we all could be enjoying..I do know we all are given what we are given we just have to make the best of it. 2018 I am working on it.