difficult child's teacher called and asked if Mon morning (it is friday pm when she calls) at 8 is okay to have a full team IEP meeting to "tweak" things. Ok this is the team that meets every 3 weeks so come on...I am not stupid, this is not to tweak anything. Here is what she said: 1. We have to talk about the cafeteria. It has "just" come to her attention that other than the issues during his "job" which has been on hold, he was not being safe in the cafeteria line. ---ok he has been OUT of the cafeteria for a week and a half. They also said he was not going to go back to lunch as we had discussed...huh???? NO, it was the end of the week for the throwing apple thing then this week for the blurting out in class thing, not another week for anything. The plan was to reintegrate him slowly at his old table and bringing the "peers" who have been taught about him to him. (I just got a call after pushing them to stop this, and stick to the original plan, they will let him in next MON) ---so if this is such a serious "ongoing" problem then why was it not discussed at the last meeting. couldn't be anything new because he was not down there. I asked the teacher, Aren't you UPSET that you just found out? Has this been every day or when the incident at the job happened (he had a cold and sore throat and is not good about covering up and then if they comment he will be nasty and continue to do it--the usual getting stuck ****) SO, she admits she is embarassed that she doesn't know why. I said, I WILL not be happy if this continues. She said, I didn't mean to upset you and I said you should be upset. How can we do anything if a behavior is allowed to continue (they know that anything that happens more than once is hard to undo with him, he is too perseverative, he will talk about it do it,no matter the consequence) and if you dont hear about it? 2. His ONLY mainstream class (alredy taken out of art and music...music was a sensory issue but art was because he painted himself), the teacher doesn't like that they let little blurt outs go by. Now, difficult child is snapping his fingers at people to get their attenton. He doesn't like that either. So much for this is a good guy who likes to work with kids iwth special needs. He likes the smiley DS kids who laugh and talk sweet to you. Not all special needs are this stereo-type. ARRGGGG So, they say it is too much for difficult child and we have to think of options. 3. They want to change his LRE.....oh, it is only from "science" to another class when we are there. (he had under lre he would be mainstreammed in science but that was the end of last year and things changed for 8th grade, and she needs to change that, it could be a simple "significant change" form that I sign....doesn't require a meeting) Then she says this is really admin calling this meeting and to come to the table with ideas. I ask straight out...ARE you thinking they want difficult child out of this school? Response was... OH no,no, no.... that is not what we want for him. SO I said, well that was careful wording, do you mean admin wants that for him...She said uncomfortably, I didn't say that. Sorry, I dont believe it. Really, all this has happened since the trained behavor support team aide has left. I am doing all the medication. management I can, we are being consistent between school and home program, everyone says the plan works well for him...AND I have never in my sp. ed. working life had a last minute IEP meeting for small tweaks in the IEP. NO WAY I believe that. I called MN disability and updated my intake and the girl said she is going to email it quickly to see if she can catch someone, she was concerned too Luckily, I called our home program psychiatric and he said he will be there and that t his has to stop now. That they have to have the behavioral data all collected to look at the incidents, it can't be rumor and upset weeks later. He says to make sure we go with the legal aid if they will take us because he sees two separate issues, an admin legal issue and some communication break down in Special Education. He said he is going to advocate very strongly for them to revisit having the trained behavior aide ongoing because though that is more expensive, it is less restrictive than a Special Education setting and he has a strong peer program going on in his day that would be lost without being in this school. I am just sick and I know that I am going to have to work hard to calm and sleep over the weekend. Teacher just called again, I flat out told her my concerns and she said again, to tell the truth, she felt stupid when I asked her why she didn't know earlier. May not ahve been her fault, but he has a behavior sheet that is documented on every day...where is the problem on those? Are they really being done in all settings? What to do in the meantime???? I dont know...I dont usually feel paranoid but there seems to be a fine line between that and trusting my "gut" lately. In the mean time, our home program coordinator says that our psychiatric is planning his retirement. I didn't need to hear that.