I want to vent, so please forgive me if I ramble. I guess I got a little comfortable with believing that maybe the foul mouth, verbal abuse, and destructiveness of difficult child was going to cease because he SEEMED to be turning over a new leaf, more in control. We have been working with him and we finally have good outside supports and interventions in place. So, of course, I was caught off guard this morning when difficult child exploded after being read the riot act by husband when difficult child once again missed the bus. It was horrible from the time it started (starting with both guys escalating to the point of things getting out of control/barely avoided a fight -- lucky I was there -- and difficult child did do some property damage before I finally got him out the door into the car) until I dropped difficult child at school. I chose to grin and bear it in order to get this kid to school and show him that I was not going to buy into his extreme reaction and ugly behavior (I know difficult child is very anxious and has some issues with his dad, but still...). When we got to his school, those inside saw something was wrong, the principal came out, calmly spoke with me, then instantly (thank goodness) difficult child's demeanor and behavior changed and he went into school peacefully. I am embarassed because I was about to cry in front of the principal and probably was shaking when he was talking to me, and I hate when I get to that point because I thought I was getting better at keeping my emotions under control. When I got home, I gave husband a piece of my mind because we had previously agreed to back away, not feed into difficult child's outbursts and try to not escalate, and husband chose to lose control and esalate anyway. Of course, my reaction to husband does not help matters and, anyway, difficult child is probably hoping to divide and conquer mom and dad... Okay, so upon re-reading the above, I know it is unrealistic to think my son is going to dispense with his long-time habits. Also, he still has not had possible other diagnoses ruled out, so, of course, I can't expect his behaviors to go away by asking him to stop. He definitely needs continued help and further evaluation. Right now, I feel like buying a one-way ticket to someplace really, really nice (like maybe St. Martin...I like it there) and would like to leave these two extremists alone to figure out how to get along. Naw...can't do that...without someone to intervene, these two would seriously hurt each other. I am just really getting tired of being the moderator.