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Let the marital discord begin
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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 28401" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>Alison - This stuff is really tough on marriages/relationships.</p><p></p><p>First off, in my humble opinion, the easy stuff. *Any* testing done by the SD is going to be purely based on educational performance and need and will have nothing to do with- medical/psychiatric/neuro issues at the end of the day. SD staff cannot diagnose nor can they prescribe treatment (medications/therapy/etc). Even if they find a need for say physical therapy or occupational therapy, you're still going to have to go to an MD to get a script for SD to provide those services. I would strongly suspect that if you take SD's evaluation to an MD, the MD is going to want to do his/her own evaluation. So it's apples and oranges. Also, being a cynic, SD evaluations are usually far less extensive and far less specific re: needs. I'd trust an independent evaluation by an MD far more than anything any SD ever hands me. But, again, I'm probably beyond cynical at this point. :wink:</p><p></p><p>The harder stuff. Men are from Mars. Pure simple fact (apologies to the men on the board). As Janet said, most men think they're fixers. I know my own husband is incredibly uncomfortable with anything remotely "emotional" (feelings, etc). Moms, on the other hand, are... well, we're moms. Emotion is part of the picture. Even after nearly divorcing over thank you's behaviors and our inability to find useful help with- him, husband completely wigged out when I had thank you admitted the first time. Sigh... it's a balancing act. Learning how to be gentle with each other, how to communicate without hurting each other's feelings, how to support each other when neither one of you has the strength to breathe practically. Tag team parenting is essential - whoever is closest to the nervous breakdown gets the break and the other one has to carry on. You switch off as needed. Takes practice, communication, and most importantly I think it's vital that you and husband take time for each other, only each other, conversations about politics, sports, weather, flowers, decorating, what*ever*, just anything but parenting and difficult children or even pcs. Remember who Alison and husband are, not as Mom and Dad, but as Alison and husband. </p><p></p><p>Hang in there.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 28401, member: 8"] Alison - This stuff is really tough on marriages/relationships. First off, in my humble opinion, the easy stuff. *Any* testing done by the SD is going to be purely based on educational performance and need and will have nothing to do with- medical/psychiatric/neuro issues at the end of the day. SD staff cannot diagnose nor can they prescribe treatment (medications/therapy/etc). Even if they find a need for say physical therapy or occupational therapy, you're still going to have to go to an MD to get a script for SD to provide those services. I would strongly suspect that if you take SD's evaluation to an MD, the MD is going to want to do his/her own evaluation. So it's apples and oranges. Also, being a cynic, SD evaluations are usually far less extensive and far less specific re: needs. I'd trust an independent evaluation by an MD far more than anything any SD ever hands me. But, again, I'm probably beyond cynical at this point. [img]:wink:[/img] The harder stuff. Men are from Mars. Pure simple fact (apologies to the men on the board). As Janet said, most men think they're fixers. I know my own husband is incredibly uncomfortable with anything remotely "emotional" (feelings, etc). Moms, on the other hand, are... well, we're moms. Emotion is part of the picture. Even after nearly divorcing over thank you's behaviors and our inability to find useful help with- him, husband completely wigged out when I had thank you admitted the first time. Sigh... it's a balancing act. Learning how to be gentle with each other, how to communicate without hurting each other's feelings, how to support each other when neither one of you has the strength to breathe practically. Tag team parenting is essential - whoever is closest to the nervous breakdown gets the break and the other one has to carry on. You switch off as needed. Takes practice, communication, and most importantly I think it's vital that you and husband take time for each other, only each other, conversations about politics, sports, weather, flowers, decorating, what*ever*, just anything but parenting and difficult children or even pcs. Remember who Alison and husband are, not as Mom and Dad, but as Alison and husband. Hang in there. [/QUOTE]
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