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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 13700" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>SLSH, </p><p></p><p>My son is currently living at home due to a broken jaw/surgery/and post op care that the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) couldn't possibly have taken under. As I sat in the surgeons office the fateful morning listening to all the "cans and could happens" I went into a trance like state. I swear I could hear someone (the surgeon) talking but for $1,000.00 I couldn't have told you one thing he had just said. Instead I was going over in my head mentally how many Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s, placements, hospitals, staff faces, kids faces, missed holidays, pain and heartache, and how many times we have tried to bring him home and how many times it stays okay for a little while and then falls apart to the point of needing another Residential Treatment Center (RTC), or placement. I had to interrupt the doctor and ask him for a moment please telling him that this was a little overwhelming. He did. </p><p></p><p>When we left the office, I saw a bumper sticker that said (for the whole enchilada I would have bet my life) REAL MEN SAVE PENNIES. (Later I was to find out it was not that at all, it said REAL MEN LOVE JESUS. But Pennies made me start laughing hysterically. Sister, I'll tell ya, I was laughing so hard, I was barking like a seal and then other dumb, non-sensical stuff popped into my head and I started talking about THAT...and 20 minutes into this comedy routine DF was so concerned about me he started to pull the car off the highway and THAT made me laugh harder. The look of concern on his face....I vaguely remember saying "What's the matter, afraid I won't pick the right color leather for your wallet in craft class? Don't worry....fughaddaboudit....I'm makin' you SLLLLLLLLLippperrrrrs." and then kept saying slippers over and over. All the while my difficult child is in the back seat witnessing what is a full blown honest to gosh, nervous breakdown. Except in MY case, being a humorous soul, I didn't cry (oh had I cried I never would have stopped) I had what is called a Reactive emotion. Trances and reactive states save us sometimes from what our body deems dangerous. Had I not laughed....I'd be making....Sllllllippers out of a foam kit or maxi pads (have you seen those they are so tacky) but I would certainly be in a mental hospital. </p><p></p><p>And yes. I do know what you are feeling on a different scale. My son, was supposed to complete this Residential Treatment Center (RTC), move to lower mgmt. home, and then to a group home setting with a job/college....and now he's home. And I'm worried. I have the same apprehensions, that he will <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/2012/censored2.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":censored2:" title="censored2 :censored2:" data-shortname=":censored2:" /> up, that he won't take ADVANTAGE of THIS opportunity of being home with us to help him, that it will only take () much for him to be off and on his wicked way, and it be the end of it. But the difference is, I really have been working in therapy the last year to let it/him go. To realize that it IS his life/choices and the consequences are HIS also. And it stinks so bad I'd rather have dinner with a skunks behind.....but it's reality. (I've already had dinner with a skunks behind, I was married once) but you get what I'm saying. </p><p></p><p>I wondered when I took difficult child out of the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) what would happen. Then I did my stress relieving technique and told myself it will be what it will be and all my worrying will NOT change or help the situation one bit. (and given a choice Atavan or Scotch?) ......I'm going to hit the High Road....Lassie. </p><p></p><p>Hugs for your heart. Tissue for your tears. Chocolate for your moods. (Oh that's me) </p><p></p><p>Love ya</p><p>Star</p><p>You suppose these two were twins separated in another life? Oy!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 13700, member: 4964"] SLSH, My son is currently living at home due to a broken jaw/surgery/and post op care that the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) couldn't possibly have taken under. As I sat in the surgeons office the fateful morning listening to all the "cans and could happens" I went into a trance like state. I swear I could hear someone (the surgeon) talking but for $1,000.00 I couldn't have told you one thing he had just said. Instead I was going over in my head mentally how many Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s, placements, hospitals, staff faces, kids faces, missed holidays, pain and heartache, and how many times we have tried to bring him home and how many times it stays okay for a little while and then falls apart to the point of needing another Residential Treatment Center (RTC), or placement. I had to interrupt the doctor and ask him for a moment please telling him that this was a little overwhelming. He did. When we left the office, I saw a bumper sticker that said (for the whole enchilada I would have bet my life) REAL MEN SAVE PENNIES. (Later I was to find out it was not that at all, it said REAL MEN LOVE JESUS. But Pennies made me start laughing hysterically. Sister, I'll tell ya, I was laughing so hard, I was barking like a seal and then other dumb, non-sensical stuff popped into my head and I started talking about THAT...and 20 minutes into this comedy routine DF was so concerned about me he started to pull the car off the highway and THAT made me laugh harder. The look of concern on his face....I vaguely remember saying "What's the matter, afraid I won't pick the right color leather for your wallet in craft class? Don't worry....fughaddaboudit....I'm makin' you SLLLLLLLLLippperrrrrs." and then kept saying slippers over and over. All the while my difficult child is in the back seat witnessing what is a full blown honest to gosh, nervous breakdown. Except in MY case, being a humorous soul, I didn't cry (oh had I cried I never would have stopped) I had what is called a Reactive emotion. Trances and reactive states save us sometimes from what our body deems dangerous. Had I not laughed....I'd be making....Sllllllippers out of a foam kit or maxi pads (have you seen those they are so tacky) but I would certainly be in a mental hospital. And yes. I do know what you are feeling on a different scale. My son, was supposed to complete this Residential Treatment Center (RTC), move to lower mgmt. home, and then to a group home setting with a job/college....and now he's home. And I'm worried. I have the same apprehensions, that he will :censored: up, that he won't take ADVANTAGE of THIS opportunity of being home with us to help him, that it will only take () much for him to be off and on his wicked way, and it be the end of it. But the difference is, I really have been working in therapy the last year to let it/him go. To realize that it IS his life/choices and the consequences are HIS also. And it stinks so bad I'd rather have dinner with a skunks behind.....but it's reality. (I've already had dinner with a skunks behind, I was married once) but you get what I'm saying. I wondered when I took difficult child out of the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) what would happen. Then I did my stress relieving technique and told myself it will be what it will be and all my worrying will NOT change or help the situation one bit. (and given a choice Atavan or Scotch?) ......I'm going to hit the High Road....Lassie. Hugs for your heart. Tissue for your tears. Chocolate for your moods. (Oh that's me) Love ya Star You suppose these two were twins separated in another life? Oy! [/QUOTE]
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