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Family of Origin
Life without Sis is amazingly, surprisingly good! Boundaries rock!
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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 628205" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>Since I am "telling" on my mom this morning (thank you, MWM, for witnessing for me)...she never did manage to make it to the hospital to see me or the baby when I gave birth to difficult child daughter, my mother (and my father's) first grandchild.</p><p></p><p>She never made it when our son was born, either. </p><p></p><p>And she worked in a hospital three blocks away.</p><p></p><p><em>And this did not seem at all unusual to me.</em></p><p></p><p>I feel badly for myself now, this morning (!) that this was so.</p><p></p><p>husband's mom came, of course.</p><p></p><p>When my children had their babies? We were there with them, in the case of difficult child daughter, or, in the case of difficult child son, who lives in Louisiana, sent lots of money and flowers and celebratory phone calls.</p><p></p><p>We visited difficult child son shortly after the baby's birth.</p><p></p><p>For difficult child daughter, who was in the same state when she had her babies, we brought red roses and fried chicken to the hospital. (You can do that, now.) </p><p></p><p>Ha! It is good, to change bad things into good and positive things.</p><p></p><p>But...what in the world do you suppose my parents were thinking, to do as they did?</p><p></p><p>They did come to love our children.</p><p></p><p>They did. For a time, ours seemed almost like a normal family. Except that, now that I am revisiting alot of this...there were hurtful things happening all along.</p><p></p><p>I feel strong and happy and right, at last, in standing up to my family of origin. I wish with all my heart that I had been strong enough to say "no" when husband insisted that family was family.</p><p></p><p>He had no idea, no way of knowing, then.</p><p></p><p>He does, now.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p><p></p><p>It is so strange a feeling, seeing all this in that kind of double vision. One, what I let myself know and the other...what has really been going on all along.</p><p></p><p>Cheesh.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 628205, member: 17461"] Since I am "telling" on my mom this morning (thank you, MWM, for witnessing for me)...she never did manage to make it to the hospital to see me or the baby when I gave birth to difficult child daughter, my mother (and my father's) first grandchild. She never made it when our son was born, either. And she worked in a hospital three blocks away. [I]And this did not seem at all unusual to me.[/I] I feel badly for myself now, this morning (!) that this was so. husband's mom came, of course. When my children had their babies? We were there with them, in the case of difficult child daughter, or, in the case of difficult child son, who lives in Louisiana, sent lots of money and flowers and celebratory phone calls. We visited difficult child son shortly after the baby's birth. For difficult child daughter, who was in the same state when she had her babies, we brought red roses and fried chicken to the hospital. (You can do that, now.) Ha! It is good, to change bad things into good and positive things. But...what in the world do you suppose my parents were thinking, to do as they did? They did come to love our children. They did. For a time, ours seemed almost like a normal family. Except that, now that I am revisiting alot of this...there were hurtful things happening all along. I feel strong and happy and right, at last, in standing up to my family of origin. I wish with all my heart that I had been strong enough to say "no" when husband insisted that family was family. He had no idea, no way of knowing, then. He does, now. Cedar It is so strange a feeling, seeing all this in that kind of double vision. One, what I let myself know and the other...what has really been going on all along. Cheesh. Cedar [/QUOTE]
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Life without Sis is amazingly, surprisingly good! Boundaries rock!
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