I am not really sure where to begin. I have an 18 yr old son that is currently in jail on simple battery charges. All because he "pushed" my husband (the only "dad" he has ever known) and another person. I am having a very difficult time dealing with this. I am having a hard time writing this because I can't get my thoughts together, so I apologize now for the ramblings. I guess I will start with his first arrest. About 2 or 3 years ago my husband's ex step son, J moved in with us. My son had a friend that had an amp stolen from his trunk while it was parked at my house. My difficult child believed that J stole it. So, he decided that he was going to take the light covers off of J's truck. While the police were at my house J made a comment to me and my difficult child bowed up at him. The cop then arrested him for threatening or something. The charges were eventually dropped because the cop that arrested him got everything wrong in the police report. That was first time I had to go get him from Juvie. The second time was because he and a few friends thought it was a good idea to go ride golf carts around a field because they knew the keys were in them. That resulted in him being charged with Grand Theft. That charge did not go away. I spoke many times and for long periods of time with an intake Juvenile PO that was going to give his recommendation. The PO and I decided to put my son in a residential drug treatment program. Well before he was sentenced to that, he got new charges of possession of marijuana and paraphernalia. They did combine the sentencing for both into the program. Unfortunately, the program had issues of its own. My son did not get a treatment plan for over 30 days. Then he did not get to meet with a counselor regularly. He ended up breaking out of the program and catching more charges. Once all was said and done, he was on intense probation or "drug" court. He was able to combine the new charges with the old ones for the probation. The intense probation was a blessing. It required that he attend weekly sessions with a counselor and also had to attend weekly group meetings. It was quite a bit on me but it did help him. Although, I don't think he was ready to be discharged when they did. They only did it because he turned 18. Once he was off of probation, things were fine for a while, then the issues started coming back. He started using K2 and has been on a fast downward spiral ever since. He was arrested a while back for stealing a gas can out of someone's garage. He plead no contest and received 2 yrs probation. I am not sure what is going to happen with that now that he has a Violation of Probation. I guess my problem is that I have come realize that I am codependent and I can't let go of him. He has been given chance after chance and continues to blow it. The K2 causes him to have really violent outbursts. Although he has never "hit" anyone during one of his fits, it is still really scary. I am trying really hard to walk away, but I find myself trying to help him. My mind tells me I can't, but my heart won't listen. I have done nothing but cry for the past 2 days. I can't keep rescuing him I know this, but I can't bring myself to do that. Thank you for letting me ramble. I don't know what to do anymore.