Long Talk With therapist

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Bunny, Feb 14, 2012.

  1. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    difficult child was supposed to have an appointment with the therapist last night, but last week he decided that he wasn't going to the therapist "until the rest of this family gets it's act together." Whatever. I kept the appointment and went myself to talk to him, figuring that we can get things out on the table that I can't necessarily say with difficult child in the room. I have to say that I think that it was really a productive meeting. When I got home I talked to difficult child and told him that therapist and I had a long talk and that therapist felt it was really productive and that he wanted him to come to the next appointment. He said that he would, although it's two weeks away and with difficult child anything is always subject to his whims. But, he said that he would go.
  2. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Glad you got some face time with therapist. I always see people before Q comes in the room and one doctor even just emailed me that we could just talk by phone so Q can show up and come in for the neuro appointment more quickly without having to wait so much.... (she is a mom to a kid with autism).... really is nice to be uncensored sometimes, right? Hope when the time comes he agrees to go!
  3. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    Those parent-therapist talks can be so helpful and now that difficult child thinks you have gotten some help (lol), he may be more willing to go.
  4. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    I've always been thankful, in the end, for those types of mtngs, where difficult child flat-out refuses to go, but then I turn it around and, as you pointed out, can talk about things that I can't discuss in front of difficult child. When life gives you lemons ...
    I sure hope he keeps his promise to go next time.
  5. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    Actually, the therapist told me to e-mail him and let him know what difficult child plans to do. If he says he's not going to go, therapist said that he will call the house and speak to difficult child himself about it! Talk about taking the bull by the horns!!
  6. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Sounds like you have a caring ally and that's worth a mint. I'm glad therapist is a team member. Hugs DDD
  7. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    I'm glad you got to do this.

    I always feel weird, when I want to discuss something with the therapist/counselor but not necessarily with Onyxx right there. As if... I should always be IN ONYXX'S FACE with everything. But, being able to lay out my concerns without constant interjections of "THAT'S A LIE!" is also very helpful!!
  8. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    Exactly!! Even the therapist was glad for the opportunity to have an open conversation to hear about what is going on from the adult's point of view.
  9. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not


    I've been thinking about you a lot....and I remember going through this very same thing. difficult child was unwilling to go to counseling since it was the "rest of us" who had the problems. And it WAS helpful to visit with the therapist without her...

    but we had to get difficult child into the sessions.

    The trick we used would be to tell difficult child that it was time for "our" appointment with the therapist. To which difficult child would usually respond "Good! You SHOULD go to the therapist." We would ask her if she was coming. She would tell us she didn't need to...

    So we would say "OK. We just thought you'd want the doctor to hear your side of the story...."

    And OH would that get her every time!!! She would JUMP to go so that she would have the chance to tell the doctor everything WE were doing wrong (not realizing, of course, that she was telling therapist exactly what we were dealing with every day.)

    Give it a shot...

    I'll bet your difficult child will happily go to "your" appointment to tell the doctor how you are handling everything wrong.
  10. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    Thanks, Daisy! It's definately something that I will have to keep in mind if he suddenly decides that he is not going.