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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 622727" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>Hi seashell. A pretty name! I can't give much specific advice because I'm not reallly competent to do so but it did occur to me reading the thread that sometimes we don't give enough credit to the idea that things change... understandable in your situation! I feel you cannot necessarily know how things might evolve with this boy (who currently has no diagnosis and no specific support/help, right?) over time if you were to make the relationship permanent and move in. It could be for the better. Or the worse. But you don't know. You do know you don't like him because of his unlovely behaviour... all too understandable... and that there is a difficult, immature mother in the picture. But this boy is going to grow up, and before too long. There is always another way of looking at a situation and one way you could look at the situation, possibly, would be to think of it as an opportunity to be a stable influence for this lad in the coming years as he grows into manhood. Or you could look at the immediate present and run away (understandably) <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> You will decide. Not an easy choice and my heart goes out to you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 622727, member: 11227"] Hi seashell. A pretty name! I can't give much specific advice because I'm not reallly competent to do so but it did occur to me reading the thread that sometimes we don't give enough credit to the idea that things change... understandable in your situation! I feel you cannot necessarily know how things might evolve with this boy (who currently has no diagnosis and no specific support/help, right?) over time if you were to make the relationship permanent and move in. It could be for the better. Or the worse. But you don't know. You do know you don't like him because of his unlovely behaviour... all too understandable... and that there is a difficult, immature mother in the picture. But this boy is going to grow up, and before too long. There is always another way of looking at a situation and one way you could look at the situation, possibly, would be to think of it as an opportunity to be a stable influence for this lad in the coming years as he grows into manhood. Or you could look at the immediate present and run away (understandably) :) You will decide. Not an easy choice and my heart goes out to you. [/QUOTE]
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