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Looks Like difficult child 2 Is Staying Where He's At
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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 10251" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>Janna,</p><p></p><p>As difficult as I know this is for you, I am breathing a sigh of relief that your atty was able to pose some thought provoking questions. Your son hasn't done a thing to show he is ready to live with his family. He and thank you share the same "anywhere but here" mentality. Things will be better, they will make better choices "anywhere but here". My standard response to that now is "show me the money". If you can do better somewhere else, you can do better where you are right now. If not, I don't want to hear it. It's *his* choice. Has nothing to do with- me anymore. I'm here to advocate when needed, oversee his treatment and schooling in very broad strokes, encourage and love him as much as he'll let me, but for now we have to continue to be families of different addresses. It's old, it's incredibly sad when you sit down and realize how *much* of our sons' lives we haven't truly been part of, just the mundane day to day stuff, but... I don't know what the alternative is.</p><p></p><p>I still have days when I think if I were a better parent, or if thank you *really* wanted to be with- us, things would be different. But it's just not going to happen. I've done the very best that I can and as we possibly get ready to transition thank you to the next step, I can only keep reminding myself (in spite of that almost irresistable urge to bring him home) that he is not ready to live here and there's a good chance he never will. </p><p></p><p>I'm so sorry, Janna. I will keep my fingers crossed that a consistent placement that cannot be manipulated by difficult child 2 can be found.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 10251, member: 8"] Janna, As difficult as I know this is for you, I am breathing a sigh of relief that your atty was able to pose some thought provoking questions. Your son hasn't done a thing to show he is ready to live with his family. He and thank you share the same "anywhere but here" mentality. Things will be better, they will make better choices "anywhere but here". My standard response to that now is "show me the money". If you can do better somewhere else, you can do better where you are right now. If not, I don't want to hear it. It's *his* choice. Has nothing to do with- me anymore. I'm here to advocate when needed, oversee his treatment and schooling in very broad strokes, encourage and love him as much as he'll let me, but for now we have to continue to be families of different addresses. It's old, it's incredibly sad when you sit down and realize how *much* of our sons' lives we haven't truly been part of, just the mundane day to day stuff, but... I don't know what the alternative is. I still have days when I think if I were a better parent, or if thank you *really* wanted to be with- us, things would be different. But it's just not going to happen. I've done the very best that I can and as we possibly get ready to transition thank you to the next step, I can only keep reminding myself (in spite of that almost irresistable urge to bring him home) that he is not ready to live here and there's a good chance he never will. I'm so sorry, Janna. I will keep my fingers crossed that a consistent placement that cannot be manipulated by difficult child 2 can be found. [/QUOTE]
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