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Losing Hope and Need Help
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<blockquote data-quote="SeekingStrength" data-source="post: 622675" data-attributes="member: 17635"><p>Hugs CA Mom.</p><p></p><p>Others will chime in, but I wanted to let you know your story is being read. I am so sorry you are having to deal with this.</p><p></p><p>Above all, he canNOT be allowed back into your home. I am not sure if you mean he is in a hospital setting right now? I saw where you called the authorities and they told you had admitted himself. I think I would take the suicide threats, and start an order to have him admitted, if he is not already. husband and I started that process about ten years ago (when our son was about 22), but difficult child left the state before anything happened. At that time, difficult child was quite depressed. He may still have those times, but we just see the anger.</p><p></p><p>My difficult child is now 32 (almost 33) and exhibits a lot of the same behavior, especially the hatred toward his parents and insisting we MUST help. Right now, we are not speaking and who knows if we ever will again. There will be no relationship until he gets much needed help. </p><p></p><p>I look forward to seeing the input of others on this board. They are very wise. </p><p></p><p>You are living a kind of hell....and will get ideas of how to get out of it. I found this board by Googling "How to stop enabling". We just get to the point where we know we cannot do it anymore.</p><p></p><p>Keep posting and reading. It will help. Others will recommend reading <u>Co-dependent No More</u>, by Beattie. It is a great book to help us realize, with no uncertainty, that we do not have the power to change anybody, including our adult children. You canNOT fix him. Like many of us, you have certainly tried.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SeekingStrength, post: 622675, member: 17635"] Hugs CA Mom. Others will chime in, but I wanted to let you know your story is being read. I am so sorry you are having to deal with this. Above all, he canNOT be allowed back into your home. I am not sure if you mean he is in a hospital setting right now? I saw where you called the authorities and they told you had admitted himself. I think I would take the suicide threats, and start an order to have him admitted, if he is not already. husband and I started that process about ten years ago (when our son was about 22), but difficult child left the state before anything happened. At that time, difficult child was quite depressed. He may still have those times, but we just see the anger. My difficult child is now 32 (almost 33) and exhibits a lot of the same behavior, especially the hatred toward his parents and insisting we MUST help. Right now, we are not speaking and who knows if we ever will again. There will be no relationship until he gets much needed help. I look forward to seeing the input of others on this board. They are very wise. You are living a kind of hell....and will get ideas of how to get out of it. I found this board by Googling "How to stop enabling". We just get to the point where we know we cannot do it anymore. Keep posting and reading. It will help. Others will recommend reading [U]Co-dependent No More[/U], by Beattie. It is a great book to help us realize, with no uncertainty, that we do not have the power to change anybody, including our adult children. You canNOT fix him. Like many of us, you have certainly tried. [/QUOTE]
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