Lovely case conference today...LONG

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by mstang67chic, May 9, 2008.

  1. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    Actually it was a follow up to one we had a while back. At that one, difficult child wanted the freedom to go to classes without having one of his "aides" with him. This was agreed to with the conditions that he go to each class prepared, his grades stay up and he has no referrals. *snort* There was a time limit to this and his first referral came on the next to the last day and just went waaaaaaaay downhill from there. (And the referral was a biggie......he left campus during lunch which is a big no no) So, the aide thing was reinstated much to difficult child's disgust. There was also a rep there from his Life After School program through Voc. Rehab. He had to apply to this program and there are only so many slots. Being as how he's 18 and all, he decided to quit the program. He already knows everything they are trying to teach him, it's boring and he doesn't want to do it. Actually, his resource teacher, after difficult child left the room, said that she knew that program was doomed. difficult child's best friend T (the sun rises and sets by T in difficult child's world) is in it too. T was trying to tell difficult child how much it helped him and how much he's gotten from it. Even hearing this from T didn't convince him.

    His grades are in the toilet and if he manages to graduate NEXT year, it will be by the skin of his teeth. Since the referral for leaving at lunch, I've received parent copies of referrals, on average, twice a week since then (first week of April)

    I had to laugh too. difficult child is not much of a reader. He prefers comics or books with pictures. (Especially those kind that have interactive things in them. He got one from the library on Egypt. It had fake envelopes in it with notes/letters from archeologists, fake jewels imbedded in pictures of royal headpieces, etc.) He has been kicked out of his Algebra class for disrespect and noncompliance so he goes to the resource room during that time. He has a lot of missing assignments and just stuff in general he SHOULD be working on. He got his resource teacher to get him a copy of Lord Of The Flies to read for "one of his other classes". Poor woman. She's usually on top of things but must be busy because she didn't even check his schedule to see if he actually had a class that required this. He's actually using READING to avoid doing any of his other work. I could just squeeze his head till it popped like a zit.

    On a (kind of) positive note though, I think I may have gotten through to husband about sticking to the deadline he gave difficult child a while back. difficult child had been VERY disrespectful and manipulative to husband and after being given a chance or two to change his tune, husband told him that he was out at the end of the school year. (I've posted about this) Since then, husband has told me privately that he regrets it saying that difficult child has nowhere to go, no money, no job and he doesn't want to put him on the street. I've told him that there were options but he was still reluctant. During the meeting, one of the reps from difficult child's case managment provider gave me the contact name and number for a host home that difficult child can go to for 2 weeks. She's also getting me the information for a shelter in the next town. Between this information (or rather, actual PROOF of it) and the fact that difficult child is terminating or turning down all sorts of services and/or help and even didn't listen to his friend T, I THINK husband is starting to get it. I only talked to him on the phone while he was on his meal break and we will talk more tonight when he gets home but it's looking hopeful.
  2. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    That's great news about husband. You never know, after a few weeks in the "host home" and a night or two in the shelter, he might change his mind about how smart he is.

    Your difficult child reminds me so much of M around that age. Smart enough to be anything he wanted, too dumb to try. Because he was going to Japan "to be a philosopher. Like Aristotle."


    So far between the 7-11 job and the temp job he got fired from, he hasn't gotten to Japan yet. Too bad, I bet they're really missing out on his righteous knowledge.


    I take it that the school is not inviting him back to finish his senior year next fall?
  3. Christy

    Christy New Member

    Why do difficult children always have to learn the hard way and even then, refuse to admit they were wrong? Or, that someone might have have been giving them helpful advice?