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Family of Origin
Malignant Narcissism
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 674994" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Loving detachment. </p><p></p><p>In my experience this is very hard. Because there is so much loss involved, there is the tendency to blame, to make somebody bad. Like pin the tail on the donkey. Either ourselves or them. I think this is because the expectation is that we are giving and loving, and when we fall short, in our own eyes, let alone theirs, it is hard to not blame somebody.</p><p></p><p>I think loving detachment requires that one achieve a certain neutrality. Getting control over our wanting. What Cedar calls ''steady state." Open to what is. Rather than what we wanted or would want.</p><p></p><p>COPA</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 674994, member: 18958"] Loving detachment. In my experience this is very hard. Because there is so much loss involved, there is the tendency to blame, to make somebody bad. Like pin the tail on the donkey. Either ourselves or them. I think this is because the expectation is that we are giving and loving, and when we fall short, in our own eyes, let alone theirs, it is hard to not blame somebody. I think loving detachment requires that one achieve a certain neutrality. Getting control over our wanting. What Cedar calls ''steady state." Open to what is. Rather than what we wanted or would want. COPA [/QUOTE]
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