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Maybe I'm crazy
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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 69280" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>It could be so many things but if you hadn't seen any signs of any issues previously, I'd go with she's too young for the responsibilities that go with being an adult. I truly believe that the "magic" numbers of 18 and 21 create more havoc in homes than puberty. They think they're adults with all the rights and privileges of adulthood but are totally unwilling to accept the responsibilities of adulthood.</p><p></p><p>I wouldn't be surprised if she's experimenting with drugs and, sadly, college and alcohol frequently go hand in hand. It is hard to determine how serious the drug and/or alcohol use is without concrete evidence or her being willing to tell you.</p><p></p><p>If your daughter does as mine did, she will leave like she did, claim you kicked her out to everyone (including herself), go from friend to friend until there is no place left to go and then ask to come back home. This happened on three occasions with my daughter. The first two times, I was so happy to have her back that I didn't put any real rules into effect. I'd say she had to follow a curfew, pay rent, etc. but then not enforce them. </p><p></p><p>The last time, she called and asked if she could come home (not just hinted). I told her the rules in advance and said if they were broken, she would be leaving by my choice and would not be coming back. We would have to have a relationship at a distance. She agreed to the rules. She has been home for two months now and things are so much better. </p><p></p><p>So, until she is reached her bottom, she's probably going to party hearty. When her friends are tired of being used, she'll come back home. At that time, I would insist some things happen. One of them would be drug testing. Another might just be therapy. I would insist that she follow house rules and if she doesn't, help her pack her things and let her know she can come back when she is ready to follow those rules but not a day before.</p><p></p><p>HUGS. I know your pain and fears but there truly is hope.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 69280, member: 3626"] It could be so many things but if you hadn't seen any signs of any issues previously, I'd go with she's too young for the responsibilities that go with being an adult. I truly believe that the "magic" numbers of 18 and 21 create more havoc in homes than puberty. They think they're adults with all the rights and privileges of adulthood but are totally unwilling to accept the responsibilities of adulthood. I wouldn't be surprised if she's experimenting with drugs and, sadly, college and alcohol frequently go hand in hand. It is hard to determine how serious the drug and/or alcohol use is without concrete evidence or her being willing to tell you. If your daughter does as mine did, she will leave like she did, claim you kicked her out to everyone (including herself), go from friend to friend until there is no place left to go and then ask to come back home. This happened on three occasions with my daughter. The first two times, I was so happy to have her back that I didn't put any real rules into effect. I'd say she had to follow a curfew, pay rent, etc. but then not enforce them. The last time, she called and asked if she could come home (not just hinted). I told her the rules in advance and said if they were broken, she would be leaving by my choice and would not be coming back. We would have to have a relationship at a distance. She agreed to the rules. She has been home for two months now and things are so much better. So, until she is reached her bottom, she's probably going to party hearty. When her friends are tired of being used, she'll come back home. At that time, I would insist some things happen. One of them would be drug testing. Another might just be therapy. I would insist that she follow house rules and if she doesn't, help her pack her things and let her know she can come back when she is ready to follow those rules but not a day before. HUGS. I know your pain and fears but there truly is hope. [/QUOTE]
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