Maybe just a little good news...

[klmno]

for a change! Principal called today about when to have FBA/BIP meeting since I wouldn't sign last one. I said I'll work with their schedule on this since it is at the end of the year. She asked my concerns and I told her it was mostly the words used in the writing- I thought our last meeting went well. She agreed- we might finally be getting on the same page! She said they could unofficially keep working with difficult child the rest of this year if I didn't mind- I said it is fine since this seems to be working for difficult child and them. Great! She even said they realize now that he has issues- there is a lot more going on than what they thought was intentional and willful bad behavior last year. They said the positve interventions that I had proposed (think Explosive Child here) had really shown them a different side of difficult child and he has not been a behavior problem this year and has shown great improvement at school. (Isn't any little kuddo about a difficult child such a wonderful thing!?!) Ok- I'm sure she wants to make sure that I'm still not talking to Special Education attny, but shoot, I'll take this however I can get it!!

So, I explain the courts difficult child has to go to in 2 weeks. I don't think she really understood his deferrment of charges last year and how much the arrest for tearing up his computer from school could influence the judge's decisions. Anyway, she said she would write a letter stating how much improvement difficult child had made and that we were all working together and they look forward to him being there next year and maybe mention his turning in the kids who had the drugs and alcohol, selling it at school. Wow again!

I filled her in on the therapist and gal situation and my looking into another therapist or day treatment, and some stuff difficult child had been expressing lately. She used to work at a therapuetic day school. She suggested not pursuing that at this time. Mainly because she said the school she had been at got a lot of kids who didn't meet their benchmarks at the day treatment, and since the local jurisdiction had funded it, the kids were - she didn't say it in these words, but it sounded like "written off". She said she thought I should try every other means I could find for adequaate outpatient therapy first. Ok!!

Then since I wooke up at 3:00am and couldn't go back to sleep due to stress over all this, and I couldn't get out of my mind the one therapist I spoke with a couple of weeks ago- I called and left message for him. He called and left a message for me later while I was at work. He said we would try to work something out. I have no idea how I will work it out with my job. But, you know, I can't sleep if I think there is something possibly better for my son and I haven't pursued it. So, I guess we'll see. I'll have other jobs in my life, probably- I will never have another son!

I still haven't heard from GAL or defense attorney. I'll be happy to explain to her what I can. It sure would be nice to go into court with a letter from new therapist stating the therapuetic approach he is going to take.

Thanks to whoever made it this far!!!

 

[tiredmommy]

K-

It's great to hear you so hopeful for the first time in so long.

 

[TerryJ2]

K, you've made some good progress. Bravo to you! Just trudging through all those phonecalls and paperwork and personalities, not to mention dealing with-your difficult child, is exhausting. It is a very long road and you're doing very well. Congrats.

 

[Sheila]

She even said they realize now that he has issues- there is a lot more going on than what they thought was intentional and willful bad behavior last year.

That's a lot of good news! The approach and attitude presented to the student can make a world of difference.

They said the positve interventions that I had proposed (think Explosive Child here) had really shown them a different side of difficult child and he has not been a behavior problem this year and has shown great improvement at school.

Way To Go, difficult child! And warrior mom! The education about behavior mgmt will benefit more than your child.

 

[klmno]

Thanks, everyone! I know inside that it probably had a lot to do with letting them know that I consulted with a Special Education attny and GAL's visit to school to check on things (she was checking on difficult child- not school- but they don't know that so much) probably influenced them. Plus, my previous correspondence and meeting with the "higher ups" in the sd. Still, if the people in the school learn anything that can help them overcome their preconceived notions about mental illness, then something has been accomplished. Thank (whatever higher power) that difficult child behaved at least well enough in school this year that they really couldn't deny that there is more going on with him.

 

[Big Bad Kitty]

You've been fighting SO hard. Glad to see a good news post from you.

 

[totoro]

I made it through your post!!! I know how it is... Sometimes it feels good just to get it out. Like a catharsis.
I am glad the Principal seems to see things from your point of view and has difficult child's best interest at heart... hopefully it will last.

 

[Wiped Out]

Way To Go warrior mom!! I'm glad they are seeing their is more than him just being difficult. Hugs.

 

[Shari]

Way To Go, K! Sounds like your hard maybe, just maybe, is starting to pay off.

 

[JJJ]

I'm so glad the school is starting to be a help, not a hinderance!!

 

[witzend]

It's great when all of our efforts actually help bring the powers that be together to work as a team for our difficult children.

 

[susiestar]

I am so happy to hear hope in your posts. It is true, you will have other jobs, but not another son - what a great outlook. sometimes this change in outlook can lead to the job doing wht it takes to keep you!

Sending big hugs,

susie

 

[klmno]

Thanks everyone!! My worry over the GAL is back- so I'll be posting about that now.... I just wish all this could stop for a while so I could go baack to a normal life.