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Parent Emeritus
Meeting part 2
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<blockquote data-quote="Tanya M" data-source="post: 728303" data-attributes="member: 18516"><p>The term "sheballs" actually made me laugh.</p><p></p><p>Oh dear Newstart, detaching is not an easy thing to do. If it was, there would be no need for a site like this. </p><p>Your feelings are quite normal considering what you are dealing with.</p><p>I think you simply coming out of the FOG (fear, obligation, guilt). You see, when you are in the thick FOG there is no questioning of whether we are enabling or not, it's when we start coming out of the FOG and seeing, really seeing the difference between helping and enabling that we start to question what we are doing. We begin to really see that helping isn't helping.</p><p>I've been at this a really long time and even though I have successfully detached from my son, he's still my son and I love him so I still have to keep things in check. </p><p>I had to stop seeing my son as my little boy. I started really seeing him for who he is really is, a grown man that is completely irresponsible and has no regard for anyone but himself. Holding onto that truth really helped me to successfully detach. </p><p>You really are doing great, don't sell yourself short.</p><p>((HUGS))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tanya M, post: 728303, member: 18516"] The term "sheballs" actually made me laugh. Oh dear Newstart, detaching is not an easy thing to do. If it was, there would be no need for a site like this. Your feelings are quite normal considering what you are dealing with. I think you simply coming out of the FOG (fear, obligation, guilt). You see, when you are in the thick FOG there is no questioning of whether we are enabling or not, it's when we start coming out of the FOG and seeing, really seeing the difference between helping and enabling that we start to question what we are doing. We begin to really see that helping isn't helping. I've been at this a really long time and even though I have successfully detached from my son, he's still my son and I love him so I still have to keep things in check. I had to stop seeing my son as my little boy. I started really seeing him for who he is really is, a grown man that is completely irresponsible and has no regard for anyone but himself. Holding onto that truth really helped me to successfully detach. You really are doing great, don't sell yourself short. ((HUGS)) [/QUOTE]
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Meeting part 2
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