Merry Christmas

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Stressed2theHilt, Dec 25, 2009.

  1. Pop in here very rarely but figured that with all the Christmas cheer it is time for an update.

    My boys are now barely 20 and nearly 19. Both are living back in Pittsburgh and learned that the grass was not greener living on the dad side of the fence.

    The oldest got his own apartment and learned that living in a not so good neighborhood is a really bad thing. He and his roommate had a home invasion and where pistol whipped pretty good. I went into Mom mode and drove the 3 hours into Pittsburgh after having some family get over and check on him. He's fine all things considered. After a week of thinking about it, they are looking for a new apartment.

    His car broke down and when that happened he lost his job delivering pizza. He's working on another one right now.

    Youngest is living with dads girlfriend at the moment. Dad got a new job and moved to VA about a month after he moved to Pittsburgh. That isn't going to well. He had a job but lost it about two weeks ago. Not entirely sure why but the boys a teenager so I'm sure his mouth has something to do with it. Otherwise he's doing well.

    Kicking them out of the nest was the best thing for all of us. While I had perfected that art of detachment from their antics, they hadn't figured out the "Mom won't keep putting up with us" part.

    It is now like having new kids. They know I love them unconditionally but that doesn't mean I like them or approve of their antics.

    The youngest was out her in Ohio visiting last week. It was a nice week. Oldest is here now and we are having a wonderful time and thoroughly enjoying each others company.

    So while I've kicked the knuckleheads out of the nest, my nest will never be empty because of my birds. :D Ten macaws and 5 african greys keep me busy and entertained. The dogs keep me grounded. hahaha

    There is a light at the other end of the tunnel and while it was occasionally a train, eventually the sun has shone thru.

    Over the trials and tribulations of the last decade, life is pretty darned good. I know they still have mistakes to be made and lessons to learn but even the "perfect" kids do. Some just choose to learn them in a more colorful way.

    I am blessed and know that I did things the right way. Hard to convince others at time and getting reamed by the family for sticking to my guns and demanding accountability has paid off.

    Both finished school. Neither is in jail. I'm not a grandmother yet. I've got a couple of kids that chose the road with the most potholes in it and they are working their way thru.

    There's my update.
  2. cakewalk

    cakewalk Member

    Very good update, Stressed. I didn't know your story before reading your update but it's always uplifting to read that there is hope somewhere down that long road. It sounds as if you are in a good place with the way everything worked out for your family.
  3. ML

    ML Guest

    I'm so glad to hear you've found peace with making tough choices. The hardest ones are usually the right ones when it comes to difficult child/adult kids. Someone told me once when you make a decision that makes you feel good it's often not in their best interest. It's hard to watch the baby you held and nursed hit the pavement and NOT buffer it somehow and yet stepping out of the way is what's best for THEM.

    I'm getting to practice with stepkid and that's hard enough. I know it will be a thousand times harder with manster.

    Best wishes for continued success in 2010. And remember, it's about the journey.


  4. Annamomca

    Annamomca New Member

    Oh My that is so much the Tracy I remember Love and Adore!