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Message I sent to my Difficult Child today...
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 683545" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>When I wrote letters to goneboy, and they were loving and apologetic (although I was never sure what I did wrong...I have a bad habit of taking all the blame.) Or I used to.</p><p></p><p>I digress. He belittled them with his wife, archived them in his computer to laugh at in the future, and it made me think hard about committing to paper.</p><p></p><p>Do they read our words or do they twist our words in their heads? Do they use our loving words against us later? Do they even read them?</p><p></p><p>My conclusion, which could be right or wrong, is that letters are mostly for us, so that our kids read our words and the letter is a turning point of some sort.</p><p></p><p>From what I've read here for do many years, it doesn't change anything. The letter made us feel better, but I've never read about good results.</p><p></p><p>Myself, i stopped communicating with goneboy years ago. I won't ever write a "from the heart" letter again. Nothing on paper. I do like respect and the letters gave him more reasons to hang onto his anger and disrespect.</p><p></p><p>Ksm, at least she apologized. Hugs!!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 683545, member: 1550"] When I wrote letters to goneboy, and they were loving and apologetic (although I was never sure what I did wrong...I have a bad habit of taking all the blame.) Or I used to. I digress. He belittled them with his wife, archived them in his computer to laugh at in the future, and it made me think hard about committing to paper. Do they read our words or do they twist our words in their heads? Do they use our loving words against us later? Do they even read them? My conclusion, which could be right or wrong, is that letters are mostly for us, so that our kids read our words and the letter is a turning point of some sort. From what I've read here for do many years, it doesn't change anything. The letter made us feel better, but I've never read about good results. Myself, i stopped communicating with goneboy years ago. I won't ever write a "from the heart" letter again. Nothing on paper. I do like respect and the letters gave him more reasons to hang onto his anger and disrespect. Ksm, at least she apologized. Hugs!! [/QUOTE]
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Message I sent to my Difficult Child today...
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