Miracle maturity in my son! Fits and starts but comes through in a crisis

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by TerryJ2, Jul 22, 2011.

  1. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    I was so upset the other day, I couldn't even type, but long story short, I was up and dressed and in the kitchen, ready to go out the door, and I hear this motor, and see a HUGE crane outside the kitchen window, on the edge of our property. I guessed that someone was doing construction work (unlikely, since it is wooded) or taking down one of our trees.

    I've probably posted here b4 about our neighbors on all sides ... having 3.77 acres is actually a burden, since people think it's public land and can let their dogs poop in our yard, walk through our yard to the water and not even ask us or introduce themselves, re-do surveys and move the lines, which requires a lawyer, yaddayadayada ... so here we go again.

    I flew out the door, (ruined my new shoes, too) and stopped the crane operator. I approached the neighbor, who ignored me, so I walked up onto his deck and stood face-to-face with-him. He looked down at his feet and talked on his cell ph and shut the door in my face.:nono:

    (Usually he swears a blue streak so maybe this was better.)
    I told the crane operator to wait 5-10 min until I found the plat/survey and zoomed home and started throwing papers and folders everywhere. I was SO STRESSED!
    difficult child came into my office and I snapped at him, "Not now! No computer, no key--they're taking one of our trees!"

    "I know. Is there anything I can do to help?"

    So I had him put back all the folders I'd dumped in my haste.

    This a.m., he went to a 1-1/2 hr eye appointment (he has glaucoma) and he hates to look people in the eye, so this was stressful for him (the assistant and dr kept telling him to look up, and had to lift his chin repeatedly), and he not only talked normally in the car all the way home, but when we got home, he held the door open for me!!!!! OMG.

    Okay, so he's still addicted to the computer, and he still yells "NO!" when he doesn't want to do chores, but every now and then, I see hope. It's inconsistent, but a little bit more every day. Maturity?

    (Oh, about the tree--in the end, we allowed the neighbors to take the tree, because it was leaning toward another neighbor--yes, I talked to THAT neighbor, too, and he said he knew about it but was not paying for it and he got a text from the mean neighbor and that's funny, why didn't he send a text to you? Yeah, right. But since mean neighbor won't talk to me, husband called and spoke with-him after he talked to our atty, and said he should have told us in advance and asked permission. They talked about the property line going down the ctr of the tree, etc. The mean neighbor said he didn't feel comfortable talking to me because "She always says no to everything." HAAAHAHHAHHA! He's been taking lessons from my difficult child.)
  2. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    Kudos to difficult child! It's great that he's learning to exert some self-control in stressful situations. :thumbsup:
  3. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    What TM said. :)
  4. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Yay for difficult child!
  5. keista

    keista New Member

    Way to go! Every step in a positive and mature direction is a step forward! Congrats to both of you!
  6. ML

    ML Guest

    All your consistency with him is paying off. I'm proud of him and of his mom.
  7. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    AWESOME!!! You really do have a great kid there - he just needs time to figure it out! The others were right, consitency in your great parenting skills may just be starting to bare good fruits. Some of our harvests take sooooo much longer than others.
  8. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Thank you all.
    But ...
    he stayed up until 3 a.m. last night playing computer games. Aaaargh! I thought he had gone to bed, but he's a sneaky one. I've got all the computer components locked up once again. He asked a little bit ago, soooooo disingenuously, when he could have the computer. "Not today."
    "Why not?"
    "Yes, 'Why not?'" and I just walked away.

    I am SO tired! I was having a nightmare and woke up with-a horrid headache and noticed the hall light on. And so it goes ...