Mom update

Abbey

Spork Queen
Talked to mom and doctor today. She was released and appears to be in good spirits. She scolded me over and over again ..."don't worry!! I'm fine!!"

Yeah.

She said if I flew up there she's be really mad at me. Oh my. I'm shaking. ;)

Final conversation with doctor is that she is still very resistant to even checking on her cancer and there is really nothing he can do about it.

So...good news is she is better.

Thanks for your thoughts and prayers.

Abbey
 

TerryJ2

Well-Known Member
I'm glad she's gotten over this hump, Abbey, and is feeling better. Now you can finish your move and get settled.
I don't know if she's in total denial or if she has decided just to let the cancer take its course. I just hope your dad knows how to make her comfortable, physically, at the end. Right now, you can all rest easy during this respite.
 

Tiapet

Old Hand
I think I agree with Terry in finishing up your move now and actually trying to put your mind to what needs to be done. Perhaps preparing your mind and self to be there for your Dad when it's time is what you might want to focus on since you say he needs so much assistance in the simplest of things. That might be when you really need to go, or close to the end. {hugs}
 

witzend

Well-Known Member
Abbey, thanks for the update. I'm glad that she is feeling better. I hope that she and your dad will be willing to talk about a visiting nurse for palliative care. It's really better to talk about these things now, so that if she does need to be rehydrated or something that can be handled at home it won't be a struggle to make that jump to the next step, and she can be comfortable at home.
 

donna723

Well-Known Member
Abbey, I'm so glad to hear that your mom is doing better and that she's in good spirits.

It sounds to me like she's taking control of her own life and making her own decisions and that's the way it should be. I know that if I were in that situation, that's exactly the way I would want it too. Sending hugs.
 

Abbey

Spork Queen
Thank you, Donna...and all.

There comes a point where you just want to have control, and I think that is where she is.

Abbey
 

everywoman

Well-Known Member
Abbey,
My grandmother, the woman who raised me and was the real "mom" in my life, passes away in 2005. She had liver disease---and it was not easy for her to give up her active lifestyle.

She was hospitalized for the last time in August. At that time she told the doctor no more treatment. She wanted to go home. She did and hospice was called in.

She lasted a few more weeks. My grandfather, they were married 55 years, had been deceased since 2002. She missed him terribly. She told us she was ready. And that it would be hard, but we needed to let her go. And she died exactly the way she wanted to, in her home, in her bed, quietly in her sleep.

She had made all the arrangements for her funeral earlier that summer. She made my minister/sister take her to the family funeral home and picked out her casket and paid for everything---She had spoken to the preacher and told him what to say and what songs to sing. It made it easier on us knowing that it was all done her way. And it was easier for her to go peacefully because she was in control.
 

Abbey

Spork Queen
Just when I think I'm dealing with this...

No, Seriously, I appreciate your response and I'm sure it was difficult for you. I am sad for your losing of a treasured family member.

This is uncharterd territory for me. I've never lost a parent...or really had to prepare for it. I guess in some sorts I have, but not fully. I've know it is coming but not this soon.

I buried both my grandmothers. No one else came. One was the light of my life, the other...well, let's say she was a bit naughty.

I'm just in a whilrwhind right now. Lots of things going on. I use humor to get by. (hope you get some of my jokes...otherwise I'll be devastetated.). Kidding.

Abbey
 

hearts and roses

Mind Reader
Hugs Abbey, I think it's great that she's made her decision regarding the chemo, etc., however, I do agree with witz about having check-ins by a visiting nurse or something. Have you and your dad discussed this at all? Not so much for the cancer, but for general every day care. It may also ease things for your dad as well.
 

Fran

Former desparate mom
Deb, she sounds good. I'm glad she told you to stay put.
Hopefully we can all have that sort of control of our own lives. She sounds a lot like you.
 

Lothlorien

Active Member
After the move is done, make sure you take some time out to go and see your parents......k? One day at a time.

I'm really glad she's doing better. Really!
 
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