Me: It is almost 3 o'clock. V: No, what time is it ?! (annoyed by my answer) Me: Yes, V. It is almost 3 o'clock. V: I want to know what time it is NOW! Not what time it will be soon! Me: It is 2:48... sigh.... I had never realized how concrete, litteral and sort of narrow minded V really is until recently. Now, I notice it everywhere and all the time. I would bet that 70% of V's issues stem from being litteral and 30% from getting "stuck" on stuff. Which I wonder if the two are actually kind of the same problem. We have a new therapist/counselor who comes to the home. He seems to think that consequences and time out will solve the tension in the family. What?? I don't think so. I was really looking forward to this therapist as he would see the dynamic at home and constent tension due to V's way of thinking. But so far, not exactly impressed. I told him I would try but was not hopeful. I have not used a time out once since he came 10 days ago! Not because things are perfect, but how can I punish V when he does not understand what is asked from him and therefor does not comply or ends up annoying his brother??? I'll give you an example: we were all cleaning up our woods. husband had the chain saw and the kids and I had to pick up the branches and put it in a pile. There were LOTS of branches all over, meaning lots of choice when it came to pick them up. Yet, V would not pick anything and would wander around or run for the branch that Partner had just picked up in order to take it to the pile himself. I had to show V which branch he could pick up and then show him where on the pile he could set it. I had to repeat the process EVERY single time. Very aggravating if you ask me. BUT V was not being oppositional, he just really did not know what to do without very specific instructions. Add some sensory issues with the chain saw running on and off... Just difficult for V altogether. So what? Was I suppose to put V in time out when he grabbed Partner's branches a few time?? How would it help him learn anything? V was just thinking "Oh, great. Now I know this specific branch CAN be picked up". He was NOT trying to be mean to Partner. What I really want: teach V to be a bit more open minded in his thinking. I don't know how to do that. And I don't believe any kind of consequence or reward system will help him learn it. Or am I wrong? There has to be a system that actively teach in a neutral way. In way that does not include failure or success. If that is even making any sense.