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Money vs. Conversation with difficult child
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<blockquote data-quote="witzend" data-source="post: 623261" data-attributes="member: 99"><p>Just reading through, and responding as I can.</p><p></p><p>"Food Stamps" aren't actually stamps anymore, it's a debit card. You can't really "give them away". You can blow them on inappropriate things.</p><p></p><p>You and your husband are parents to a grown son. Your job with him is done - for better or worse. Your marriage is to each other and is supposed to be "foresaking all others". When our children are grown, our relationships with our spouses <em>should</em> come first.</p><p></p><p>My husband and I had a conversation last night about our 27 y/o son and the phone we supply for him. He's <em>married</em> and we pay for his phone! <em>What</em> are we thinking? He calls us a couple of times a year for advice he doesn't take. Sometimes he asks for money, but not often. I have no clue if he is working at this point. The current 2 year contract on the phone runs out in May. husband and I agreed that we need to tell him now that we won't be renewing his phone so that he can get his act together before then if he wants to continue it. Don't even get me <em>started</em> on my family's guilt trips regarding my kids. It's so bad that we moved 2,700 miles with no forwarding address to get away from them and they <em>still</em> think that they have a horse in this race.</p><p></p><p>Our tag lines (signatures) are added on our profile page. Go up to the right hand corner and click your name. Then on the left side of the account page that comes up, under "Personal Details" you can click on "Signature". Type in basic information there. It helps to know how old your difficult child is, have they been diagnosis'd with anything, something about you and the rest of your at home family, too. I try very hard to keep anything that would definitively ID me out of it. What I do and say here is too private to share.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="witzend, post: 623261, member: 99"] Just reading through, and responding as I can. "Food Stamps" aren't actually stamps anymore, it's a debit card. You can't really "give them away". You can blow them on inappropriate things. You and your husband are parents to a grown son. Your job with him is done - for better or worse. Your marriage is to each other and is supposed to be "foresaking all others". When our children are grown, our relationships with our spouses [I]should[/I] come first. My husband and I had a conversation last night about our 27 y/o son and the phone we supply for him. He's [I]married[/I] and we pay for his phone! [I]What[/I] are we thinking? He calls us a couple of times a year for advice he doesn't take. Sometimes he asks for money, but not often. I have no clue if he is working at this point. The current 2 year contract on the phone runs out in May. husband and I agreed that we need to tell him now that we won't be renewing his phone so that he can get his act together before then if he wants to continue it. Don't even get me [I]started[/I] on my family's guilt trips regarding my kids. It's so bad that we moved 2,700 miles with no forwarding address to get away from them and they [I]still[/I] think that they have a horse in this race. Our tag lines (signatures) are added on our profile page. Go up to the right hand corner and click your name. Then on the left side of the account page that comes up, under "Personal Details" you can click on "Signature". Type in basic information there. It helps to know how old your difficult child is, have they been diagnosis'd with anything, something about you and the rest of your at home family, too. I try very hard to keep anything that would definitively ID me out of it. What I do and say here is too private to share. [/QUOTE]
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Money vs. Conversation with difficult child
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