More ex drama. Just a little vent.

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Californiablonde, Feb 4, 2013.

  1. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    So the kids had yet another fun weekend at their dad's. Not. First difficult child was told she was acting like a b**tch by her stepmom when she was whining. Then she was called stupid. The kids and their dad and stepmom were walking around a store when the lights suddenly shut off. About a minute later the lights came back on again. difficult child made a comment like, "Oh darn. I was kinda looking forward to shopping in the dark." Stepmom says to dad, "Here's our next generation." Points at difficult child, and says, "Stupid." difficult child got very hurt and angry but she held it in and didn't say anything. Then when stepmom started saying bad things about me right in front of my kids, difficult child could no longer take it. She stood up for me. Stepmom didn't take it well at all. Started screaming at difficult child. So when I finally picked up the kids at their dad's they both ran to the car and hugged me. difficult child thanked me for finally picking them up.

    They were miserable with stepmom's constant put downs, screaming and yelling their entire visit. I don't know if I should even bother to tell their dad. OH and when difficult child stood up to stepmom, dad warned her and said, "You know V doesn't like your mom. So don't say anything. Cause then she is going to get mad at not only you, but me too." So now difficult child feels the burden being put on her to maintain the peace in the family and hold everything in. I don't think it's right. She shouldn't have to put up with the the stepwitch saying bad things about me right in front of her. So saying something to her dad probably won't do any good. I'm just sick of being my kids being treated like **** and I can't say anything about it. Stepmom still hasn't apologized for saying she hates the kids. So they continue to be verbally abused and it just isn't fair. Okay vent over.
  2. buddy

    buddy New Member

    She is awful but dad is a tool. He needs to BE the dad. KIDS come FIRST. He needs to tell her to keep her thoughts in her thought bubble. Just because you think something does not mean you need to say it. She needs social skills training more than my own son!
  3. HaoZi

    HaoZi CD Hall of Fame

    *Sigh*. Didn't the judge order parenting classes? They do that here when you divorce. Your ex shouldn't be allowing her to smacktalk you in front of the kids, period. The kids shouldn't be put in that position to begin with.
  4. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    We both got parenting classes plus court ordered couples therapy. Our therapist specifically told us that trash talking the other parent in front of the children was a big no no. He used to do it too. Tell the kids bad stuff about me all the time. But then I called him out on it, he apologized, and it stopped. But stepmom continues the trash talking and he lets her. Makes me sick. And calling difficult child and her generation stupid is just mean and spitefull.
  5. dstc_99

    dstc_99 Well-Known Member

    Ummmm I would refuse to let them go if the stepwitch is there. I know you are in a bind right now but I would tell him if it happens again you are taking them to an abuse counselor for verbal abuse and that you will start demanding supervised visitations.

    I know by law you probably have some sort of contract as to who gets who when but when abuse is involved it can all be thrown out the window as long as you contact the right people. It is unacceptable for him to allow his new spouse to treat his children this way.
  6. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Honestly...all I can say is you see LOSER in the dictionary and your ex's picture is there!

    Your poor kids! I never understood how anyone could allow a SO to treat his own kids like crapola. He's really a piece of work. I'm so sorry for your poor children.
  7. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    What really upsets me is I never say bad stuff about them to my kids. Never. Even when my kids tell me stories of how their stepmother says she hates them, and when she calls difficult child a b**tch and stupid, I say nothing except for "That was not right of her to talk like that to you." Both my kids used to just sit there and take it. difficult child is fifteen now and is finally learning to stand up for herself. Stepmom tells difficult child, when she voices her feelings, that she is disrespecting her. Hellooo! Stepmom disrespects my kids ALL the time and that's okay? And I want to say bad stuff about her but I keep silent for my kids' sake and say nothing. I can't even stand hearing the witche's name around me but I have to stomach it and put a smile on my face in front of my kids. And SHE has no reason not to like me. We have never even spoken, except when she texted me out of the blue, calling me an ugly b**tch for no reason at all. I don't like to use the word hate. It's such a strong word. But I really really hate her with a passion. I wish he would just divorce her already! Ugh.