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Substance Abuse
My 29 year old son is homeless and addicted, and 700 miles from me...
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<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 674685" data-attributes="member: 19522"><p>Hello Pam and welcome to CD. I am so sorry for your hurting Mommy heart, I know the pain of it. It is the hardest thing I know.</p><p></p><p> This is difficult to realize, it is not the picture we have for our children's future. But, Pam it is good to know what you are dealing with.</p><p></p><p> It is hard to know our d cs are homeless. I am sorry.</p><p></p><p> I do understand your wanting to help your son. He is your son.</p><p></p><p> I understand the pain of this.</p><p></p><p> He is 700 miles away, how would you find him? You are just learning of his disposition, this is heart wrenching, I know. My daughter is out on the streets, using. We have had her in and out of our home, trying to help her. She has chosen this life. It is hard Pam, but it is true. Our d cs only learn from the consequences of their choices. I am sorry, but your son has to be ready to choose rehab himself. The best thing you can do right now, is slow......way....down.</p><p>We want to jump up to the rescue, but often times we end up marching to the beat of their drum. My daughter will come to me one day disheveled and down, barely able to speak, I lose my mind with worry. The next time I see her, bubbly and frenetic.</p><p>The difference? When down, she is not <em>high</em>.</p><p>She continues to use and struggle, despite living near us, and having many opportunities to get clean. She does not want to. It is up to her.</p><p></p><p></p><p> This sinking is a part of his using drugs. He is an adult making bad choices, it is tough to deal with, for sure. Pam you have much value in your life.</p><p></p><p>I understand your first instinct to help him, but he has to want to help himself. Our d c's know our desire to help, and ask us for money. Sadly, they often use this to buy drugs. Our d c's know how to tug at our mama heart strings, to get what they want, I am sorry Pam, but this is true. You cannot help him if he does not want to help himself.</p><p></p><p> It is hard to know of the amount of people suffering with this. You have found a good place to share your hurt and your story. We have most of us, been where you are at, Pam. Stay with us and keep posting, we help each other. You will receive others suggestions or advice but it is your decision and we respect that. You are not alone. Please do not blame yourself for the choices your adult son makes. Often times, my two will try to reel me in with guilt. I have learned it is a manipulation.</p><p>Others will come and share. Let your sadness out, then breathe Pam. Take time to think, before you react. You have time for this.</p><p>My heart goes out to you.</p><p>(((Hugs)))</p><p>leafy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 674685, member: 19522"] Hello Pam and welcome to CD. I am so sorry for your hurting Mommy heart, I know the pain of it. It is the hardest thing I know. This is difficult to realize, it is not the picture we have for our children's future. But, Pam it is good to know what you are dealing with. It is hard to know our d cs are homeless. I am sorry. I do understand your wanting to help your son. He is your son. I understand the pain of this. He is 700 miles away, how would you find him? You are just learning of his disposition, this is heart wrenching, I know. My daughter is out on the streets, using. We have had her in and out of our home, trying to help her. She has chosen this life. It is hard Pam, but it is true. Our d cs only learn from the consequences of their choices. I am sorry, but your son has to be ready to choose rehab himself. The best thing you can do right now, is slow......way....down. We want to jump up to the rescue, but often times we end up marching to the beat of their drum. My daughter will come to me one day disheveled and down, barely able to speak, I lose my mind with worry. The next time I see her, bubbly and frenetic. The difference? When down, she is not [I]high[/I]. She continues to use and struggle, despite living near us, and having many opportunities to get clean. She does not want to. It is up to her. This sinking is a part of his using drugs. He is an adult making bad choices, it is tough to deal with, for sure. Pam you have much value in your life. I understand your first instinct to help him, but he has to want to help himself. Our d c's know our desire to help, and ask us for money. Sadly, they often use this to buy drugs. Our d c's know how to tug at our mama heart strings, to get what they want, I am sorry Pam, but this is true. You cannot help him if he does not want to help himself. It is hard to know of the amount of people suffering with this. You have found a good place to share your hurt and your story. We have most of us, been where you are at, Pam. Stay with us and keep posting, we help each other. You will receive others suggestions or advice but it is your decision and we respect that. You are not alone. Please do not blame yourself for the choices your adult son makes. Often times, my two will try to reel me in with guilt. I have learned it is a manipulation. Others will come and share. Let your sadness out, then breathe Pam. Take time to think, before you react. You have time for this. My heart goes out to you. (((Hugs))) leafy [/QUOTE]
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My 29 year old son is homeless and addicted, and 700 miles from me...
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