My cousin's family/update

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Nomad, Nov 3, 2009.

  1. Nomad

    Nomad Guest

    I've been forlorn about the loss of my cousin last year and very recently it was the anniverary of her death. I realized that my communication with- her husband and two sons has been limited, but had hoped for improvement. I reached out to the mother in law, who I have a close relationship with. We write regularly...short, nice notes...I believe appreciated on both ends.

    I also wrote short notes to everyone over the last few days.

    Guess what? I got short, but lovely notes back from everyone in return this time. One son seem to sincerely express hope that we would keep in touch with- one another.

    I feel kinda kinda weird about it all, but GOOD. Knowing that they are okay means a lot to me and also knowing that they know that I am there for them also means a lot to me as well. My gut tells me it is a healthy thing for all concerned. I did not burden them with- obligation, but simply let it be known that I care. They responded in a lovely way. I know that when my own mother died, this was the type of thing I appreciated.

    Still missing her terribly...but feel much better about the entire situation.
  2. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    It's great that you've reached out to your extended family about this. It's hard to know what to do, how to approach people after a loss, but usually if we think of what has helped us in the past, it's very likely to be helpful to others in similar situations. I hope your relationships with the other family members continue to grow. And that the pain of your loss continues to ease with time.

  3. Nomad

    Nomad Guest

    Thank you.
    Totally flummoxed at how deeply saddened I have been over the last day or two.
    When the death occurred I was overburdened with- a few other things and I recall saying to myself over and over again "you have to concentrate at the tasks at hand right now" Don't know if that had anything to do with- how hard this hit me...sense I am feeling better and better, as it should be.
    Guess what? Just got a facebook invitation from that one he WAS very serious. Perhaps he feels similarly to me...
    Just grateful for it all...and for your kindness.
  4. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    I'm so happy you heard back from the family.
  5. Mattsmom277

    Mattsmom277 Active Member

    What a lovely outcome!!! I admit when I saw this post title, I dreaded reading. I thought it was going to be a painful thing. How awesome that it worked out this way. I'm glad you handled it how you did. I can imagine how much those notes meant to you!
  6. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    That's wonderful! Thanks for sharing.
  7. Star*

    Star* call 911


    I think you're right about the son that sent you the invitation. It seems he is reaching out too. I would imagine his loss is being felt this time of year so much than others realize - other than you. I bet he cherishes the note you sent and even more? The sentiment and sincerity behind it. You're a wonderful woman.