B
bran155
Guest
Hey everyone, I hope all is well with all of you. I haven't been on in a while, a lot going on here. I will try to make this as short as possible.
Update on my crazy life:
Where do I begin? For starters, my husband lost his job. He has worked for this company as a sales rep for 8 years, he has never missed his quota and has been a hard working loyal employee. He is ranked number 2 out of 600 sales reps. He gets awards all of the time, he is good at what he does. He makes good money, far more than the other reps, so that is why we think he got fired, they dont want to pay him the big bucks anymore!!! So we have been stressed about that, with Christmas right around the corner and rent due, we are pretty much screwed.
My lovely daughter stole our debit card and went shopping. A while ago we had requested a duplicate card as the strip on the back no longer worked. The old card was supposed to be null and void once we activated the new one, well, that never happened. So last Friday we were having our weekly meeting with our sw, my daughter was getting ready to go out. She came out of the bathroom not realizing that her shirt was up, I noticed in her pocket was what looked to be my debit card. I questioned her and demanded that she give it to me. Of course she said it wasn't mine it was her friends. Me and the sw were asking to see it, she refused to let us see it and walked out the door. So my husband checked in his wallet to make she hadn't taken ours. It was in the wallet. At that point we didn't realize she had taken the old one that was supposed to be cancelled. A couple of days later my husband got a few e-mails from the bank saying that there were irregular charges on our account. Sure enough my difficult child had stolen our old debit card and went shopping!!! We were furious. She has never stolen anything of monetary value from us before. We leave cash around all of the time and she has never taken any of it. My husband was as mad as I had ever seen him. I thought he was going to kill her. We called the police and an officer came out to the house to take a report. Meanwhile the day before my daughter had the nerve to call me and brag about the pretty boots she had gotten. What nerve!!! To steal our debit card buy boots and then tell me about them, no remorse whatsoever!!! Anyway, my daughter wasn't home when the cop was taking the report. We gave him a brief history of what life has been like with her. He said that this was a felony and she would be arrested and go to jail. Real jail, not juvie, she is 17 now and considered an adult in the eyes of the criminal court system. So he told us to call the station when she got home and he would come back out to the house and arrest her. Not five minutes later she walked in the door. I asked her if she had anything she wanted to tell us and of course she said no. We told her about the e-mails and she got really angry and said we were lying and called us a few choice words. (the nerve) So I then showed her the police incident report and she got really nervous. She tried to get out the door, so I am in one room trying to keep her in the house and my husband is in the other calling the station. She goes out the front door and says she needs to go to the store. As she is leaving the cop pulls up and she has a look of panic on her face. He tells her to come back in the house so we could all talk. As she is walking in front of him he bends over and picks up, what I later learned was my debit card. She had thrown in on the ground. We get inside and she starts telling her lies. The cop lets her play the game a little before he shows her that he picked up the debit card from the ground. I started crying whe I saw that he had it. I guess there was just a flicker of hope left in me that she didn't really do this, but when I saw the card it made it all real. I was devastated that she would do this right when my husband lost his job. I felt horribly betrayed as did my husband. Anyway, the officer cuffed her and took her to jail. She spent the night in the police station and was given $500 bail. She was calling us crying and begging us to bail her out before they sent her up to the county jail. We of course did not bail her out. The next morning we went to court. The DA actually did not want to send her to jail. He felt badly that she is mentally ill. My sw and I explained to the DA that we had tried everything to help this kid, she had been throught the family court system already and had already been place into 3 different rtcs. We asked that he put her in jail so she could see that there are real consequences to her actions. He was reluctant but he did it. He said that he would let her go to jail just for a few days. So he and her lawyer explained this to the judge privately and the judge raised her bail to $10,000 to ensure that no one would be able to bail her out. We have to go back to court on Friday and she doesn't know this but thats when she will be let out. I was surprised that the court worked with us. They were actually empathetic to my daughter's situation which made me feel better knowing that they actually care that she is mentally ill. In the meantime she is calling us crying and really feeling it. GOOD!!! However, still no remorse, she is saying that this is our fault, how can we put our own daughter in jail, she still not taking any responsibility for her actions. She hates jail though!!! I am hoping that the outcome will be probation with stipulations that include weekly therapy, medication compliance and curfews as well as drug testing. We'll see....
I still cannot believe we put my daughter in jail and pressed charges on her. It hurts like HECK, but I know I did the right thing. She has to learn one way or another. I am hoping that this experience will make her want to change her life. So far, I dont see anything in her but rage. She is very angry. She has to know that when you commit a crime you will be punished whether it is against your parents or a stranger the outcome will be the same. I am hearbroken, very sad, but I do not regret this one bit. We have done and gone through so much for her that this was a slap in the face. Especially given the fact that my husband just lost his job. She is by far the most selfish human being I have ever known.
I have such an uneasy feeling, I am very uncomfortable in my skin right now. Even though I know we did the right thing it doesn't feel good. I cant sleep and I cant stop thinking about this. It hurts and I am drained. I just cant take anymore. When does this get any better? We are all just so worn out and beaten down emotionally. I feel as though I am walking around in a daze. Pinch me, I still cant believe this is my life. I never thought in a million years I would be forced to put my child in jail. What a life!!!
If you got this far, thanks for sticking it out. And once again, thanks for listening.
Update on my crazy life:
Where do I begin? For starters, my husband lost his job. He has worked for this company as a sales rep for 8 years, he has never missed his quota and has been a hard working loyal employee. He is ranked number 2 out of 600 sales reps. He gets awards all of the time, he is good at what he does. He makes good money, far more than the other reps, so that is why we think he got fired, they dont want to pay him the big bucks anymore!!! So we have been stressed about that, with Christmas right around the corner and rent due, we are pretty much screwed.
My lovely daughter stole our debit card and went shopping. A while ago we had requested a duplicate card as the strip on the back no longer worked. The old card was supposed to be null and void once we activated the new one, well, that never happened. So last Friday we were having our weekly meeting with our sw, my daughter was getting ready to go out. She came out of the bathroom not realizing that her shirt was up, I noticed in her pocket was what looked to be my debit card. I questioned her and demanded that she give it to me. Of course she said it wasn't mine it was her friends. Me and the sw were asking to see it, she refused to let us see it and walked out the door. So my husband checked in his wallet to make she hadn't taken ours. It was in the wallet. At that point we didn't realize she had taken the old one that was supposed to be cancelled. A couple of days later my husband got a few e-mails from the bank saying that there were irregular charges on our account. Sure enough my difficult child had stolen our old debit card and went shopping!!! We were furious. She has never stolen anything of monetary value from us before. We leave cash around all of the time and she has never taken any of it. My husband was as mad as I had ever seen him. I thought he was going to kill her. We called the police and an officer came out to the house to take a report. Meanwhile the day before my daughter had the nerve to call me and brag about the pretty boots she had gotten. What nerve!!! To steal our debit card buy boots and then tell me about them, no remorse whatsoever!!! Anyway, my daughter wasn't home when the cop was taking the report. We gave him a brief history of what life has been like with her. He said that this was a felony and she would be arrested and go to jail. Real jail, not juvie, she is 17 now and considered an adult in the eyes of the criminal court system. So he told us to call the station when she got home and he would come back out to the house and arrest her. Not five minutes later she walked in the door. I asked her if she had anything she wanted to tell us and of course she said no. We told her about the e-mails and she got really angry and said we were lying and called us a few choice words. (the nerve) So I then showed her the police incident report and she got really nervous. She tried to get out the door, so I am in one room trying to keep her in the house and my husband is in the other calling the station. She goes out the front door and says she needs to go to the store. As she is leaving the cop pulls up and she has a look of panic on her face. He tells her to come back in the house so we could all talk. As she is walking in front of him he bends over and picks up, what I later learned was my debit card. She had thrown in on the ground. We get inside and she starts telling her lies. The cop lets her play the game a little before he shows her that he picked up the debit card from the ground. I started crying whe I saw that he had it. I guess there was just a flicker of hope left in me that she didn't really do this, but when I saw the card it made it all real. I was devastated that she would do this right when my husband lost his job. I felt horribly betrayed as did my husband. Anyway, the officer cuffed her and took her to jail. She spent the night in the police station and was given $500 bail. She was calling us crying and begging us to bail her out before they sent her up to the county jail. We of course did not bail her out. The next morning we went to court. The DA actually did not want to send her to jail. He felt badly that she is mentally ill. My sw and I explained to the DA that we had tried everything to help this kid, she had been throught the family court system already and had already been place into 3 different rtcs. We asked that he put her in jail so she could see that there are real consequences to her actions. He was reluctant but he did it. He said that he would let her go to jail just for a few days. So he and her lawyer explained this to the judge privately and the judge raised her bail to $10,000 to ensure that no one would be able to bail her out. We have to go back to court on Friday and she doesn't know this but thats when she will be let out. I was surprised that the court worked with us. They were actually empathetic to my daughter's situation which made me feel better knowing that they actually care that she is mentally ill. In the meantime she is calling us crying and really feeling it. GOOD!!! However, still no remorse, she is saying that this is our fault, how can we put our own daughter in jail, she still not taking any responsibility for her actions. She hates jail though!!! I am hoping that the outcome will be probation with stipulations that include weekly therapy, medication compliance and curfews as well as drug testing. We'll see....
I still cannot believe we put my daughter in jail and pressed charges on her. It hurts like HECK, but I know I did the right thing. She has to learn one way or another. I am hoping that this experience will make her want to change her life. So far, I dont see anything in her but rage. She is very angry. She has to know that when you commit a crime you will be punished whether it is against your parents or a stranger the outcome will be the same. I am hearbroken, very sad, but I do not regret this one bit. We have done and gone through so much for her that this was a slap in the face. Especially given the fact that my husband just lost his job. She is by far the most selfish human being I have ever known.
I have such an uneasy feeling, I am very uncomfortable in my skin right now. Even though I know we did the right thing it doesn't feel good. I cant sleep and I cant stop thinking about this. It hurts and I am drained. I just cant take anymore. When does this get any better? We are all just so worn out and beaten down emotionally. I feel as though I am walking around in a daze. Pinch me, I still cant believe this is my life. I never thought in a million years I would be forced to put my child in jail. What a life!!!
If you got this far, thanks for sticking it out. And once again, thanks for listening.
