My first day of work next week and I'm freaking out

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Californiablonde, Aug 26, 2015.

  1. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    Most of you know I work at a high achool. I've been on bacation for the past two months and now it's time for me to go back to work. I haven't been able to enjoy my summer at all because I've been obsessing about the first day of school, which also happens to be my BIRTHDAY! My birthday is going to be terrible this year. Remember it's my job to call all the parents and relatives of the students who never show up and tey to track them down. I have about 100 calls to make every day for at least ten days and I get major panic attacks making phone calls. I am atreaaing about this badly. I start back to work next Tuesday, but the first day of school is on September 8th. That's when the phone calls start. I am really really dreading my birthday this year. Good thoughts and prayers needed!
  2. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    Excuse the typos I'm on my phone and it's hard to type!
  3. Lil

    Lil Well-Known Member

    Sending good thoughts and prayers your way and HAPPY birthday wishes from a fellow Virgo! Mine is Sept. 6. :)

    Don't fret so! Yes, you have a lot of calls to make, but you make them as quickly and calmly as you can and remember - you've done this job before - you can do it again.
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  4. Tanya M

    Tanya M Living with an attitude of gratitude Staff Member

    Happy early Birthday!!

    What are you going to do to treat yourself for your birthday? You should do something special.

    As for making all those phone calls, I'm impressed. That's a lot to do and you have done it before.
    Try not to look at as 100 phone calls as I think that can be overwhelming. Maybe break it down into groups of say 5 or 10, then the number doesn't seem so daunting.
    Remember to breathe, slow deep breaths.

    I have no doubt you will just fine.

    Keeping good thoughts for you!!
  5. ForeverSpring

    ForeverSpring Well-Known Member

    CG, to get it out of your system, maybe tell us why those calls scare you so much. I have anxiety about certain things too, and it helps to put it down on paper. Do the people yell at you? Is that it? It doesn't sound like a pleasant task. by the way, I thought you got a better job, no?

    Missed you this summer. Sorry you were nervous all summer about your job. I can obsess too, but am trying to do better with it.

    Your birthday is close to mine :)
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  6. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    You can do it, you've done this, just keep in mind that it ends. and I have the same birthday! CB ...everyone is nervous, the kids and teachers are as well. Think of us on your shoulder giving you strength.
  7. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    Thank you all for your kind words. I have a massive phobia of talking on the phone. It doesn't help that people get mean and angry with me for disturbing them. I am still having PTSD from growing up with my dad, who was very abusive, and yelled and screamed a lot. Now as an adult any time anybody gets upset at me for any reason I get huge anxiety attacks. Oh, and I went to register easy child for school today and I did not see my supervisor, the attendance technician there at registration. I think she may have gotten another job and I will have a new supwrvisor. Some attendance technicians make the assistants do all the phone calling instead of splitting it up half and half like I'm used to. And some supervisors have it to where you make the truancy phone calls every single day instead of once a week. No way could I handle making truancy calls every single day and no way could I handle being the one making all the phone calls. Normally my supervisor and I split it up the alphabet half and half. If this new person makes me do all the phone calls every day I will seriously freak out. I am really hoping and praying this isnt the case. I am still looking for another job in the district where I don't have to make calls to parents but so far no luck. There was a job opening a couple montjs ago I was going to apply for but it turned out to be a lessser paying job so I didn't apply. Now I almost wish I had. No amount of money is worth this stress!
  8. pasajes4

    pasajes4 Well-Known Member

    I will pray for you. Try to remember not to take it personally when the contact does not respond to you in a warm and fuzzy manner.
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  9. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    We missed you this summer CB. Welcome back.
    My birthday is in September too, seems we have quite a few September birthdays...... Happy birthday.
    Yes, do something kind for yourself on your birthday.
    Saying a prayer for you CB, I hope your new supervisor makes your job easier.
    Try to focus on the parts of the job that you enjoy and are easy for you. I know how difficult it can be when you are so stressed.
    Take care of yourself CB......
  10. AppleCori

    AppleCori Well-Known Member


    Welcome back to the forum!

    Haven't heard from you in a while.

    Do you have a doctor that you are working with? Your anxiety level is just off the charts. Your summer was spent in worry over the phone calls. This can't be good. If you haven't talked to someone about this, maybe consider doing so. If you already have a doctor and possibly anxiety medications (which aren't effective enough) maybe you could look into getting your job changed/duties altered under the Americans With Disabilities Act.
  11. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    CB..write down some standard replies that you can just read and repeat with without thinking. If they say yes, you read your standard response, no thinking. Be a fly on the wall yet say what you must. No one will know but us. You can get through it by not thinking as you do it all. Have responses ready, be on autopilot. I know you have done harder stuff at work. You can do it.
  12. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    I am on A new medication called Brintellix which is an SSRI. I don't have the best luck with antidepressants. I've been on this stuff for over 2 months and it's not helping. Yesterday my doctor decided to double my dose from 10 to 20. He also has me on Neurontin which does help a little bit but not much. I do notice though that my chest lain and joint pain is almost non existent now. I don't know of the medication has anything to do with it. Anyway, i am hoping the increased dose of Brintellix helps. Unfortunately I won't know for about 4 to 6 weeks. I also got the name of a cognitive behavior therapist so I am going to make an appoinment with her. Wiah me luck. I have had really bad luck with female therapist in the past but we shall see.
  13. AppleCori

    AppleCori Well-Known Member


    How was work today?

    We are thinking of you and hope you have a great day!

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  14. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    Apple I am at work right now and trying not to freak out. I still have the same supervisor but I have a new boss! And guess what? This new boss just transferred from another high school where the attendance ladies had to make the truancy phone calls every single day all year long! I am only used to making the absence calls once a week, and that was bad enough! I can't imagine having to make 50 plus phone calls a day every single day 5 days a week. I hope and pray this new boss does NOT make me call every day. My stress level could not handle it. He wants to have a meeting later to discuss attendance procedures and I'm really nervous. Wish me luck!
  15. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    What happened at the meeting CB?
  16. AppleCori

    AppleCori Well-Known Member

    Hope things worked out well in the meeting!

    If things aren't getting any better for you, I want to encourage you to at least talk to your doctor about what accommodations you may be able to get worked out through the ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act).

    My daughter got an accommodation at work this way when she needed it, and at least in her case, it helped a great deal.

    Keep us posted.
  17. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    We haven't had the meeting yet ladies. My boss says he wants to meet with me before the first day of school, which is next Tuesday. That means it could be any time within the next three days. I am trying not to freak out. My sleep has suffered greatly because of this. In the last two days I have only gotten 6 hours of sleep TOTAL. I am starting to get that headachy disoriented feeling a person gets from lack of sleep. What's worse is that my anxiety is greatly heightened when I don't get enough sleep. I am hoping and praying I have a better night tonight. It's only Wednesday!
  18. nlj

    nlj Well-Known Member


    I know.
    It's the same for all of us working in education.
    The new year starts in September and ends in July.

    The one positive thing though is that at least it ends. Every July.

    I think of those people who have jobs that are a never-ending treadmill that carry on in an everlasting loop... and then I'm glad that I work in education and reach an end each July and have a chance for a fresh start each September.

    Hope you have a nice birthday, despite the school start!

  19. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    NLJ I definitely feel blessed that I work for a school. I have gotten spoiled in the last nine years with all the breaks I get. I could never go back to a regular job. I am used to my many vacations and I count on them to help me cope throughout the year. I am currently looking for another job, but at a school district only. No way could I handle a year round job at this point in my life. I need my time off.
  20. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    What did your therapist and your psychiatrist tell you to do to handle this? How well are you following their recommendations? have you truly explained just how bad things are at work? Maybe printing off your posts on this thread would help them have a better idea of your mental state so t hat they could help you more effectively?

    When things are this bad and your mind is coping with this much stress & anxiety, it is very important to have professional help AND to make sure they know what is going on. Very few patients are able to give a really accurate description of what is going on during an appointment. it is NOT you holding things back, it is the stress of the appointment on top of the other stress & upset. This is why it is so important to print off your posts describing what you are experiencing. If you have a diary or journal it could be helpful for your doctor to read PARTS of it, but ONLY if you are comfortable sharing that with him.

    I am sorry you are so miserable.