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My life is hell
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<blockquote data-quote="gottaloveem" data-source="post: 64558" data-attributes="member: 1953"><p>Bette- I wish I had the magic words to make your pain less. I know I do not. </p><p></p><p>The burden is very heavy and intense and you are so new to this grief journey. It takes a long time to get better. I say it was like I was walking along the path of life just fine and somebody took a baseball bat and swung at me as hard as possible sending me as far back and deep down as possible, and now I have to climb out. One day you will start climbing out and your heart will start to heal. I'm not sure we will ever heal completely. When your heart is ripping, come here and post (or the other child grief websites I told you about)(although, you have been a member here at conduct disorders for awhile and may be more comfortable here) Whatever works. I think it could be therapeutic to write down the pain you are experiencing. On my worse days I don't usually say much to anybody. I just ride out the painful days because I know they are necessary.</p><p></p><p>Having your older sons legal worries to think about is making this so much more difficult to handle. I can understand your extreme anxiety. Perhaps losing his brother and going to jail will be what it takes for your oldest son to turn his life around. </p><p></p><p>How is your middle son holding up?</p><p></p><p>You and your family are in my thoughts.</p><p></p><p>Lia</p><p></p><p>PS:I hate to bring this up again but I really think it might be helpful to try reading the posts at mychildlossgrief.com There are moms there who's children have been murdered. There are parents there who are going through legal issues surrounding their childrens deaths. Not to mention all the other parents there who have lost children all different ways. You don't have to join to read the posts, just if you want to post something.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="gottaloveem, post: 64558, member: 1953"] Bette- I wish I had the magic words to make your pain less. I know I do not. The burden is very heavy and intense and you are so new to this grief journey. It takes a long time to get better. I say it was like I was walking along the path of life just fine and somebody took a baseball bat and swung at me as hard as possible sending me as far back and deep down as possible, and now I have to climb out. One day you will start climbing out and your heart will start to heal. I'm not sure we will ever heal completely. When your heart is ripping, come here and post (or the other child grief websites I told you about)(although, you have been a member here at conduct disorders for awhile and may be more comfortable here) Whatever works. I think it could be therapeutic to write down the pain you are experiencing. On my worse days I don't usually say much to anybody. I just ride out the painful days because I know they are necessary. Having your older sons legal worries to think about is making this so much more difficult to handle. I can understand your extreme anxiety. Perhaps losing his brother and going to jail will be what it takes for your oldest son to turn his life around. How is your middle son holding up? You and your family are in my thoughts. Lia PS:I hate to bring this up again but I really think it might be helpful to try reading the posts at mychildlossgrief.com There are moms there who's children have been murdered. There are parents there who are going through legal issues surrounding their childrens deaths. Not to mention all the other parents there who have lost children all different ways. You don't have to join to read the posts, just if you want to post something. [/QUOTE]
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