My seemingly perfect easy child?difficult child (difficult child#!) has lost his halo. Cuss/Cry/Sigh!

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by DDD, Jul 20, 2012.

  1. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    He knows I know. He is avoiding me in shame. husband does not know and I won't share with him as he, too, has serious health problems. I'm having such a hard time accepting this new backslide. There is no doubt that he loves me. Once again, however, he has proven that he loves himself far more. I feel blindsided and am doing my best not to stress out as the MD's say stress likely caused the cancer and can surely shorten my life. I am sad. DDD

    PS: I feel compelled to encourage Timer Lady to abandon ship before she, too, is terminal. Whine!
  2. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Awww DDD I'm sorry, what a heartbreak. But you Dr is correct, you need to remain as stress free as possible. I've had the same thought about timerlady. She is fragile and needs to take care of herself now.

    I'm thinking of you and husband and sending positive energy.

  3. AmericanGirl

    AmericanGirl Guest


    I am so very sorry. I'm praying that this backslide is the one that causes him to make a permanent turnaround.

    I'm proud of you for thinking of your needs and of your husband's needs. Sadly, it is the only sane reaction you have.

    If you need a shoulder, mine is always available. 24/7.
  4. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I'm sorry, DDD.


  5. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I'm so sorry DDD, I understand your disappointment and sadness. Hugs to you, prayers for your health, your husband's health and your difficult child's waking up and allowing you the peace you deserve.
  6. Calamity Jane

    Calamity Jane Well-Known Member

    Oh man, that stinks. I'm so sorry for all of it, DDD.
  7. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    ahhhh shucks. I bet its the stress of whats going on with you. Kids react differently to stress of loved ones and I am sure he is scared to do for you.
  8. exhausted

    exhausted Active Member

    DDD, I am so sorry. I know this pain and it just doesn't get easy. I am praying for your health and that you may have peace in knowing that you all share love and you have done the best that you can. (((Hugs)))
  9. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Thanks. I am past the "gobsmacked" stage today. He really has been so outstandingly easy child for the past few months that I honestly didn't expect the difficult child side to show up again. Naive me. Fortunately I have worked on detachment for the past couple of years and I'm bouncing back fast and following the directives in the Serenity Prayer. My focus is where it needs to be. Your help is really valuable. DDD
  10. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    DDD, Hugs to you...........
  11. pinevalley

    pinevalley Member

    DDD: You totally amaze me with your strength! You have really learned how to detach from your difficult child, and your strength is helping all of us on this board. Please take good care of yourself, because you really have to think about your health right now. I am sending many HUGS to you....