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Substance Abuse
My son has changed :-)
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 651591" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>This is so promising and I hope he continues to make progress. You can now breathe again. What a relief for the knot in our stomachs to be gone for a while. My son is better too right now. </p><p></p><p>I am cautiously optimistic and am working hard to be very careful about how I respond to him. I am continuing to practice healthy boundaries with him.</p><p></p><p>For example, on Saturday he texted me a picture of his arm. It was bleeding. He was at work and he said the table saw "got him." Doing that is part of his old "shock and awe" behavior. I used to react loudly and emotionally to this type of thing. This time I texted, looks like that hurts. Then he texted back yes I have been accident prone for the past couple of months. I said sounds like it.</p><p></p><p>That is all. No mommy stuff. How are you? Are you leaving work? Are you gojng to the hospital? None of that.</p><p></p><p>People usually do not do a 180 turn overnight. The person still has many of their own behaviors that usually will resurface. In AA they talk about the pink glow of early sobriety. It's like the feeling you have when you first fall in love. That passes in time as we know.</p><p></p><p>The point is not to take away one single thing from your sons positive experience and steps forward. A spiritual awakening is a wonderful thing and is a great foundation for ongoing sobriety. </p><p></p><p>My son is working full time plus and paying his own bills. He is sweet and kind. He is dealing with problems. Our interactions are positive. But he has a long way to go. </p><p></p><p>I am trying to keep my head on straight about that and realize there is no instant fix. For any of us in life.</p><p></p><p>Life is messy and chaotic and filled with back and forth, error and resolution. </p><p></p><p>Keep on taking care of you and practicing detachment with love and freedom from enabling. If you continue your own forward progress, you free up more space and time and distance for him to do the same.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 651591, member: 17542"] This is so promising and I hope he continues to make progress. You can now breathe again. What a relief for the knot in our stomachs to be gone for a while. My son is better too right now. I am cautiously optimistic and am working hard to be very careful about how I respond to him. I am continuing to practice healthy boundaries with him. For example, on Saturday he texted me a picture of his arm. It was bleeding. He was at work and he said the table saw "got him." Doing that is part of his old "shock and awe" behavior. I used to react loudly and emotionally to this type of thing. This time I texted, looks like that hurts. Then he texted back yes I have been accident prone for the past couple of months. I said sounds like it. That is all. No mommy stuff. How are you? Are you leaving work? Are you gojng to the hospital? None of that. People usually do not do a 180 turn overnight. The person still has many of their own behaviors that usually will resurface. In AA they talk about the pink glow of early sobriety. It's like the feeling you have when you first fall in love. That passes in time as we know. The point is not to take away one single thing from your sons positive experience and steps forward. A spiritual awakening is a wonderful thing and is a great foundation for ongoing sobriety. My son is working full time plus and paying his own bills. He is sweet and kind. He is dealing with problems. Our interactions are positive. But he has a long way to go. I am trying to keep my head on straight about that and realize there is no instant fix. For any of us in life. Life is messy and chaotic and filled with back and forth, error and resolution. Keep on taking care of you and practicing detachment with love and freedom from enabling. If you continue your own forward progress, you free up more space and time and distance for him to do the same. [/QUOTE]
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