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My son is a heroin addict and I just kicked him out again
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 727394" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Welcome Lisa. You may want to change your name if that is your real name, remember this is an anonymous site so as to protect us and our kids too.</p><p></p><p>The most difficult thing I think we parents have to do is to detach from our troubled kids. You're not alone, most of us here on the adult kids forum have or are going thru this.</p><p></p><p>More often than not, our adult troubled addicted or mentally ill kids do not change on their own.....we do all of the changing. They may change. OR not. But that is up to THEM.</p><p></p><p>We find ways to thrive in a devastating scenario......we find support in therapy, 12 step groups, parent groups, NAMI (the National Alliance on Mental Illness) thru the church, or wherever we can find solace, guidance, support, no judgement, compassion and nourishment. I would encourage you to find a support system where you feel safe and seen and heard. It is very hard to do this alone. Many parents find comfort in Al Anon, Narc Anon or Families anonymous. </p><p></p><p>You matter too. Your life matters. The peace, safety and comfort in your home matters. Your son has made choices which he now is facing the consequences for. There are shelters, food banks and places for your son to go for the day and the night if he so chooses. It hurts our hearts in ways that are indescribable, however, enabling your son has not helped him and is not going to help him. </p><p></p><p>You may find info and solace in the article on detachment at the bottom of my post here. A good book many of us find helpful is Codependent no more by Melodie Beattie. </p><p></p><p>Hang in there Lisa, this is very difficult. You're not alone. I'm glad you're here with us. Keep posting, it helps to write our stories down and feel heard by those who understand and have empathy......get as much support and help as you can, it will soften the blow to your mothers heart.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 727394, member: 13542"] Welcome Lisa. You may want to change your name if that is your real name, remember this is an anonymous site so as to protect us and our kids too. The most difficult thing I think we parents have to do is to detach from our troubled kids. You're not alone, most of us here on the adult kids forum have or are going thru this. More often than not, our adult troubled addicted or mentally ill kids do not change on their own.....we do all of the changing. They may change. OR not. But that is up to THEM. We find ways to thrive in a devastating scenario......we find support in therapy, 12 step groups, parent groups, NAMI (the National Alliance on Mental Illness) thru the church, or wherever we can find solace, guidance, support, no judgement, compassion and nourishment. I would encourage you to find a support system where you feel safe and seen and heard. It is very hard to do this alone. Many parents find comfort in Al Anon, Narc Anon or Families anonymous. You matter too. Your life matters. The peace, safety and comfort in your home matters. Your son has made choices which he now is facing the consequences for. There are shelters, food banks and places for your son to go for the day and the night if he so chooses. It hurts our hearts in ways that are indescribable, however, enabling your son has not helped him and is not going to help him. You may find info and solace in the article on detachment at the bottom of my post here. A good book many of us find helpful is Codependent no more by Melodie Beattie. Hang in there Lisa, this is very difficult. You're not alone. I'm glad you're here with us. Keep posting, it helps to write our stories down and feel heard by those who understand and have empathy......get as much support and help as you can, it will soften the blow to your mothers heart. [/QUOTE]
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My son is a heroin addict and I just kicked him out again
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