I really have to agree with the odorous agricultural output comment -
From the time we are born/maybe even conceived? Our brains are like mini computers taking in all the sounds, sights, smells, feelings, all the senses are working and storing data as if it were a polaroid on steroids. ALL of these things are kept in our psyche. The recall of the human mind is phenominal. It's what creates our map - tells us how to get back home, remembers things, smells, friends - every single memory we have. So from the time we exist? We're taking in input. The emotions we feel knowingly to remember and things we subconsciously store - are there. The adoption issues ARE issues but most of them are Subconscious.
You said he has attachement issues - Where do the experts thing THAT comes from? I would venture a guess that at some point in his "memories" (small file that it is to recall) his brain has been traumatized and REMEMBERS - being taken away or a stressful situation surrounding attachment. I could be as loony as a gooney bird - but I was eight - in second grade. I had a fantastic Mom. PHENOMINAL Mom. But on this day at school she was FIVE minutes late picking me up and I was - about out of my tree - I remember it like it was yesterday when I recall it now. I was sobbing, and inconsolable, I had snot running out of my nose, it was like I had seen my puppy run over. Then she pulled up - and I saw her in the car - and it was a HUGE relief. I had NO idea - NONE - why it bothered me so much. I mean she was FIVE minutes late. It wasn't until I did EMDR therapy and recalled that memory - at age 8 - that it became apparent to me that even THAT FAR BACK IN MY LIFE - I realized that I was petrified of being abandoned. What an odd memory to recall - right? Wrong. From then on I recalled other memories about being left at school if she was late. She tried NOT to be - but things happen. I was labled "high strung" - a Mommas girl. Not really.
SO yes - they are issues, and I had NO idea why until I was in my late thirties...and it DID affect other things in my life - it was the FOUNDATION for lack of SELF-ESTEEM - I mean you're 8 - kids make fun of you - Youre' a MOMMIES GIRL - KWYING BECUSZZE YOUWE MOMIE ISZNUT HERE..hahaha. (now you're labled) ------and bullied.....and it runs down hill from there. trust me - I know.
SO it does matter......it's not that the ANGER is maybe an issue right now.....but what other little things he has NO control over -----the anger he may have control over.....other things he doesn't.
Hope this makes a little sense. I have absolutely no medical training - I just have a heart and a ton of therapy with an excellent therapist and I did EMDR therapy with a top rated EMDR guy - and I would recommend it for anyone at any age..at any time. It was freeing.
As far as an adoption therapist? I'd bloody well advertise for one. There has to be someone local that can understand and explain it and see it......and help him. Even more that the other stuff.
WIth regard to what you said - Like I said - Feel free to ask me about the holy water incident......ahhhhhhh.....maybe not. lol. The only thing I can tell you is I'm not Catholic, and my son will NEVER EVER watch the exorcist for the rest of his life - because all I could remember was the words The power of Christ compells you while I threw the container of water on him after I dumped the bubbles out. Yeah - so no judgement here. (makes sign of the holy cross) et domini e spiritu sanctu......have a nice night.
Hugs -
Star
