My son is still doing well

[toughlovin]

Hi everyone, Well my son is still doing well and still thinking things through and making some good decisions. He has been at the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) for a month and it is time for him to go to the step down program. It is a small program and so a lot of the programming has been with both groups. He is not crazy about the guys in the step down program because he does not feel they are serious about recovery.....so he talked to them and at least for now they are letting him stay with the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) program because as he said those are the guys i got clean with!! The fact that he is advocating for himself and wanting to be with the guys who are really serious is amazing in itself.

He also has a hernia and needs to have surgery to have it fixed. This of course is a worry because of pain medication!! He knows this and has been worried about this but he is talking to them about allowing him to be in their detox center during recovery so they can manage the pain medications! The fact that he realizes that he needs someone else to manage the pain medications for him is also amazing and that he is asking for that and coming up with solutions for that! Hopefully they will be able to figure that piece out but it sounds like they will.

I would be willing to go out to see him during his operation but in no way do I want to be at all responsible for managing his medications. I dont want the dynamic between us with that, and given his history and what happened when he got his wisdom teeth out i know that would be a disaster.

Anyway he continues to be thinking things through even as obstacles come up and I am very pleased about it all.... and very hopeful.

This is so absolutely different from any other time he has been in treatment.

For those of you feeling hopeless, go back and read the history of my son and I hope this can give you hope!

 

[comatheart]

I need to go back and read it. I can really use a positive life story right about now. Sounds like hes advocating and setting a lot of healthy boundaries for himself. That's fantastic! I hope it continues!

 

[1905]

This makes me so happy for you and your son. I'm proud of him!

 

[Calamity Jane]

It sure looks like he's really getting it all together, TL. I'm so proud of him for thinking ahead and advocating for himself. It really looks like he wants to make it this time! Sad to hear about the hernia, though. I'm sorry he has to go through surgery of any kind.

 

[toughlovin]

Well he called today. The surgery is scheduled for Tuesday and is outpatient surgery... then he will go into the detox center for a couple of days so they can manage the pain medications. Once he has basically recovered his plan is to go to a sober living place and do IOP!!

Its funny because he is talking the talk in a way he never has before. I asked him today about the guys he says are like "children" although they are actually older than him. So I asked how that was true... and he said they are still talking about wanting to look good and be able to go to bars and have the party life.... they havent really hit bottom yet and they will be back! Now you know this was him not too long ago!!! So somehow this bottom for him was different than any other... and maybe that is because he got to this bottom with no push from us??? It wasnt that we kicked him out, it wasnt that he was homeless, it was all on his own. Anyway it is definitely different and I am gald.

 

[Lil]

This all sounds so positive! I'm very happy to read this. As for his surgery, granted I'm a woman and so swelling is different if it's in the pelvic area, but I did have hernia surgery recently. He will be sore for a few days, but realistically, the pain should not be too bad as long as he doesn't overdo it and stays fairly sedentary. Ice will help a lot. What a great thing that he has realized that taking the medications could be a problem and choose to stay where he can be monitored. As I said, very positive!

 

[AppleCori]

Wow, TL!

It sounds like he is starting down the right path.

It is not an easy road, but he will be all the stronger for it.

Please continue to update!