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The Watercooler
my very tragic difficult child/bipolar mother
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 550071" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>I'm sorry your family members throw their judgments at you, I agree with another poster, that it's their own judgments about themselves and their lack of support for your mother that gets twisted into blame. I'm glad you managed the day so well so it served you and YOUR immediate family, that was a smart move. You've done quite a remarkable job in moving beyond your mother's mental illness and into your own life, you deserve to have a life free of the long reaching arm of mental issues and find your own happiness.</p><p></p><p>I understand all of what you are saying from so many different angles, it was painful to read it. My daughter will end up like your mother if she doesn't make changes in her life now, she has many of the same traits and, as we know, the illness is progressive. I took my granddaughter out of a very unhealthy environment living with my daughter and thankfully, she won't be writing your post someday. My father lived on the periphery of your mothers world, never quite falling off the cliff but exhibiting similar creepy behaviors which were so difficult to deal with as a child. Now my sister and brother live in that world, but gratefully, they have no kids. Sometimes it feels as if my granddaughter and I are the sole survivors of the sinking ship called mental illness.</p><p></p><p>I have much empathy and compassion for you and what it takes to live among those lost and disturbed family members and escape that reality yourself. You've done everything you can do for your mother, as I have for my daughter, and now it's time for you to go have your life and leave her in G-d's hands. Those judgmental relatives don't get it, but we do. Gentle hugs coming to you, and lots of warm wishes for a lovely, engaging time with your son and your family.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 550071, member: 13542"] I'm sorry your family members throw their judgments at you, I agree with another poster, that it's their own judgments about themselves and their lack of support for your mother that gets twisted into blame. I'm glad you managed the day so well so it served you and YOUR immediate family, that was a smart move. You've done quite a remarkable job in moving beyond your mother's mental illness and into your own life, you deserve to have a life free of the long reaching arm of mental issues and find your own happiness. I understand all of what you are saying from so many different angles, it was painful to read it. My daughter will end up like your mother if she doesn't make changes in her life now, she has many of the same traits and, as we know, the illness is progressive. I took my granddaughter out of a very unhealthy environment living with my daughter and thankfully, she won't be writing your post someday. My father lived on the periphery of your mothers world, never quite falling off the cliff but exhibiting similar creepy behaviors which were so difficult to deal with as a child. Now my sister and brother live in that world, but gratefully, they have no kids. Sometimes it feels as if my granddaughter and I are the sole survivors of the sinking ship called mental illness. I have much empathy and compassion for you and what it takes to live among those lost and disturbed family members and escape that reality yourself. You've done everything you can do for your mother, as I have for my daughter, and now it's time for you to go have your life and leave her in G-d's hands. Those judgmental relatives don't get it, but we do. Gentle hugs coming to you, and lots of warm wishes for a lovely, engaging time with your son and your family. [/QUOTE]
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my very tragic difficult child/bipolar mother
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