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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 44709" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Tanya, I think contacting your insurance company is a good idea. And you can t ell this to them too, if you need to - the earlier these kids are diagnosed, the earlier they get help and the better their chances of NOT costing the health system and insurance companies much more later on.</p><p></p><p>For an example of amazing progress, I need go no further than difficult child 3. He was very slow to talk, incredibly sow to even recognise his own name (or that names even existed) and we thought he was deaf, except he could hear a chocolate wrapper crinkle from the other end of the house.</p><p></p><p>difficult child 3 failed his first IQ test. We were told he was "borderline" and autistic. He would never be able to go to a normal school and would be some years before we could even think of sending him to ANY school. We were told he would be dependent on us for life and to not expect too much, this was going to be a burden.</p><p></p><p>difficult child 3, in fact, is very bright. The problem was, he didn't understand the spoken word at the time and so the testing was flawed (in my opinion). He has since tested as IQ of 145 which we were told was likely to be an underestimate.</p><p></p><p>But whatever the numbers are, it's how he is performing that is more important. He works on his schoolwork fairly independently. he is self-motivated. I still need to help him get started (task-changing problems) but he appreciates my help in this and often now can continue on from there. He did today - he finished a unit of English but wanted a change, so chose to do a unit of Science and stopped it in time to do some German, purely to brush up his pronunciation. Then after he had gone overtime with study for the day but finally reached a logical point to stop, he told me he was now going out for a walk because after a day of studying indoors he needed a little bit of exercise.</p><p></p><p>He had his day organised, he worked well, he discussed schoolwork with me at various times and he followed through on his organisation which eventually included play time with the neighbour. He then came home and did his chores, went through his evening routine with only minimal reminders and went to bed on time.</p><p>Talking to his teachers today, he's mostly scoring between 8/10 and 10/10 in every subject. He is studying a mainstream curriculum in every subject (although about to change back in geography - separate story).</p><p></p><p>Why is he doing so well? Because as soon as we realised what was wrong we set about trying to find out what the problem was, and what to do. A lot of what we did we worked out for ourselves, due to lack of services. He is still autistic, he still has problems and he will need a lot more support than the average kid/young adult (eventually) but his prognosis is much better than anything forecast, because we didn't take bad news for the final answer.</p><p></p><p>What you do for your kids - who among us wouldn't die for their kids? They are our life, our future. We want them to be the best they can be, so we do what we can for them when we need to. Doing what we can sooner buys us more time and helps overcome problems sooner, with better outcome.</p><p></p><p>I don't know if your son can be helped as much as difficult child 3. Maybe more, maybe less. We just don't know. But what I CAN say - if you postpone the possible bad news, he will miss out on help that could make a difference. The earlier we can start, the better the outlook. </p><p></p><p>And the best we can do, is the best we can do. We can't do any more than our best, we shouldn't beat ourselves up for not succeeding, if we gave it our best shot.</p><p></p><p>I hope you get some positive news with some useful recommendations.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 44709, member: 1991"] Tanya, I think contacting your insurance company is a good idea. And you can t ell this to them too, if you need to - the earlier these kids are diagnosed, the earlier they get help and the better their chances of NOT costing the health system and insurance companies much more later on. For an example of amazing progress, I need go no further than difficult child 3. He was very slow to talk, incredibly sow to even recognise his own name (or that names even existed) and we thought he was deaf, except he could hear a chocolate wrapper crinkle from the other end of the house. difficult child 3 failed his first IQ test. We were told he was "borderline" and autistic. He would never be able to go to a normal school and would be some years before we could even think of sending him to ANY school. We were told he would be dependent on us for life and to not expect too much, this was going to be a burden. difficult child 3, in fact, is very bright. The problem was, he didn't understand the spoken word at the time and so the testing was flawed (in my opinion). He has since tested as IQ of 145 which we were told was likely to be an underestimate. But whatever the numbers are, it's how he is performing that is more important. He works on his schoolwork fairly independently. he is self-motivated. I still need to help him get started (task-changing problems) but he appreciates my help in this and often now can continue on from there. He did today - he finished a unit of English but wanted a change, so chose to do a unit of Science and stopped it in time to do some German, purely to brush up his pronunciation. Then after he had gone overtime with study for the day but finally reached a logical point to stop, he told me he was now going out for a walk because after a day of studying indoors he needed a little bit of exercise. He had his day organised, he worked well, he discussed schoolwork with me at various times and he followed through on his organisation which eventually included play time with the neighbour. He then came home and did his chores, went through his evening routine with only minimal reminders and went to bed on time. Talking to his teachers today, he's mostly scoring between 8/10 and 10/10 in every subject. He is studying a mainstream curriculum in every subject (although about to change back in geography - separate story). Why is he doing so well? Because as soon as we realised what was wrong we set about trying to find out what the problem was, and what to do. A lot of what we did we worked out for ourselves, due to lack of services. He is still autistic, he still has problems and he will need a lot more support than the average kid/young adult (eventually) but his prognosis is much better than anything forecast, because we didn't take bad news for the final answer. What you do for your kids - who among us wouldn't die for their kids? They are our life, our future. We want them to be the best they can be, so we do what we can for them when we need to. Doing what we can sooner buys us more time and helps overcome problems sooner, with better outcome. I don't know if your son can be helped as much as difficult child 3. Maybe more, maybe less. We just don't know. But what I CAN say - if you postpone the possible bad news, he will miss out on help that could make a difference. The earlier we can start, the better the outlook. And the best we can do, is the best we can do. We can't do any more than our best, we shouldn't beat ourselves up for not succeeding, if we gave it our best shot. I hope you get some positive news with some useful recommendations. Marg [/QUOTE]
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