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<blockquote data-quote="SeaGenieTx" data-source="post: 668131" data-attributes="member: 18773"><p>Wow New Leaf you are dead on - I did hit that analysis stage... you are right. But I do see clearly I am not to blame. When my alcoholic brother kept clawing at me for help, I turned him away. He lost everything, became homeless then was found dead on the street from drinking himself to death. My son exhibits his same mentality - its like my brother has reincarnated himself in my son. </p><p>My brother lost his job, cashed in his 401K, ran thru that and unemployment money, home was seized, he let all his neighbors come buy up anything in his house and then left on foot. He got arrested for writing hot checks, breaking in to vacant houses to sleep, then he was found dead. </p><p></p><p>I guess the mentality of an addict is they just want to get drunk or high and nothing else matters. No one can help them no matter how hard they try. Some people just want to go deep into misery and self destruction I guess. Ive had practice with my brother and know I cant help my son, he must help himself. </p><p></p><p>Its so hard New Leaf to focus on anything right now - I feel like Im grieving a death... and trying not to worry is hard.</p><p></p><p>Ive had so many phone calls in the past with "Im sorry to inform you but so-in-so has passed away" or "this is Sheriff so-in-so and we have your son in custody" or "This is the coroners office and your brother was found expired in the street"... or "Mom! They are taking me to jail... Ive been in a accident my head is bleeding"...</p><p></p><p>Ive received all those calls... I cant bear to get one that my son was found dead. </p><p></p><p>I hope my son changes but we need distance and no communication for a while. He hates me right now and I need some relief from his clown car ride - my head is spinning.</p><p></p><p>Thank you - anytime you guys respond I read it immediately via the phone app. This is helping me cope and do the right thing. Thank u all for such sage advice and wonderful support (((hugs)))). Ive lost those last 5 nagging pounds finally due to this ordeal (there is a positive!). Keep the kind words and advice coming - Im reading & re-reading this as needed when tears start welling up....</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SeaGenieTx, post: 668131, member: 18773"] Wow New Leaf you are dead on - I did hit that analysis stage... you are right. But I do see clearly I am not to blame. When my alcoholic brother kept clawing at me for help, I turned him away. He lost everything, became homeless then was found dead on the street from drinking himself to death. My son exhibits his same mentality - its like my brother has reincarnated himself in my son. My brother lost his job, cashed in his 401K, ran thru that and unemployment money, home was seized, he let all his neighbors come buy up anything in his house and then left on foot. He got arrested for writing hot checks, breaking in to vacant houses to sleep, then he was found dead. I guess the mentality of an addict is they just want to get drunk or high and nothing else matters. No one can help them no matter how hard they try. Some people just want to go deep into misery and self destruction I guess. Ive had practice with my brother and know I cant help my son, he must help himself. Its so hard New Leaf to focus on anything right now - I feel like Im grieving a death... and trying not to worry is hard. Ive had so many phone calls in the past with "Im sorry to inform you but so-in-so has passed away" or "this is Sheriff so-in-so and we have your son in custody" or "This is the coroners office and your brother was found expired in the street"... or "Mom! They are taking me to jail... Ive been in a accident my head is bleeding"... Ive received all those calls... I cant bear to get one that my son was found dead. I hope my son changes but we need distance and no communication for a while. He hates me right now and I need some relief from his clown car ride - my head is spinning. Thank you - anytime you guys respond I read it immediately via the phone app. This is helping me cope and do the right thing. Thank u all for such sage advice and wonderful support (((hugs)))). Ive lost those last 5 nagging pounds finally due to this ordeal (there is a positive!). Keep the kind words and advice coming - Im reading & re-reading this as needed when tears start welling up.... [/QUOTE]
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