My boyfriend and his then 6 yr old son moved in with my son (age 6) and I in June. We had been doing pretty good for the past few months, but I have a feeling the honeymoon is over for the kids. "A" spends most of his waking moments trying to **** off my son. "J" is a quiet, sort of old soul who never has a mean word for anyone. So he is shocked and appalled at first over "A"'s comments. 5 months pass...more of the same. "J" seems to just let it flow over him for the most part, but even his Ghandi-like patience has come to an end. Every morning and every evening it is the same B.S. Anything "A" can do to **** off "J" he does. Sometimes he gets caught and sometimes I just hear the yelling. "A" has a dual diagnosis of ADHD and ODD. He went to foster care at 2d of age and was adopted by my boyfriend and his late wife (they were his foster family). He was born exposed to meth, coke, alcohol, weed, heroin and tobacco. Both my son and "A" have lost a parent in the past 2 yrs. So here is where I need advice. I love my boyfriend and his son ( although some days I would love to strangle "A"). I am worried my son will be permanently scarred by having to live in such a high stress environment. Some days I honestly worry that "A" will inflict serious bodily harm on "J". He has tried twice in the past and just gotten lucky. At what point do I let the actions of a 6 yr old control my life? Is it solely my boyfriend's responsibility? I don't want to have to end my relationship. "J" has a great time with my boyfriend and usually with "A". I just worry that some day the angry, evil glimmer I sometimes see in the eye of "A" will be directed at my son and I won't be around to stop it. Once he shut "J"'s hand in a sliding glass door while I was watching and he had this evil grin the whole time. It was blazingly obvious he did it on purpose cause he was mad. Only acted sorry after he was caught. What the hell do I do? Help!!!