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Substance Abuse
Need help with my 17 year old son
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 636575" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>You must take care of yourself and your daughter. THat must be your priority now. Your son, sadly, cannot be helped unless he wants that help. Good luck to him at being emmancipated. He must show maturity and some way to financially support himself. Smoking pot and skipping school does not show that, and courts will NOT look kindly on that. Report him missing as he is not iwth you where custody orders say he should be. That covers YOU from reports of neglect etc... in case this other family gets the brilliant idea of suing you for support for him living in their home. A friend here got sued for that recently because her daughter decided she wanted to live with her boyfriend and his mom. The support was denied as the daughter has a home with her mother, just doesn't want to live there. The boyfriend's mom lets them share a room sans birth control (cause that goes against God's plans for procreation, don'tcha know? - and yes the mom said that in court!!!) and drink and smoke and use all they want and the girl's mom won't let the boyfriend go into the bedrooms or let them smoke or drink alcohol or use any drugs or watch porn. Gee, is it any wonder the court said the mom not only doesn't have to pay support but that the daughter is supposed to live iwth mom and not the boyfriend. not that the cops will enforce it, but . . . The judge was furious about the 'God's plan for procreation' koi though - his rant was pretty good but made no impression on the boyfriend, the daughter or the boyfriend's mom (how is it okay with God for the kids to use drugs and watch porn??? but not to use birth control? some people make no sense!)</p><p></p><p>Anyway, file a missing person report, then file harrassment/stalking charges against your ex as often as you can catch him. Change the number on your phone and let him email you. The cops in your area are not as likely to be influenced by your ex, so hopefully that helps you. </p><p></p><p>Your area DV shelter will provide therapy to you as a survivor of DV and as someone being currently abused by an ex domestic partner - the stalking etc... are still DV and they will provide free therapy. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE take it. Trust me, it will make you a better and stronger and happier parent and person and it will help your daughter. Take your daughter to therapy also - it will help her avoid violent relationships and abusive patterns and of course that is what we all want for our daughter's!</p><p></p><p>For your son, he knows that you love him and have rules bc you love him. Unless he ill abie by the rules, he can support himself. He won't find it easy and in a short time the new family will get tired of him. I have seen it here over and over. their true colors always emerge and the new family gets tired of the freeloading. Your ex's lies will emerge also, and if they don't, well, you don't want them as friends, do you? </p><p></p><p>I am glad you found us, but sorry you need us.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 636575, member: 1233"] You must take care of yourself and your daughter. THat must be your priority now. Your son, sadly, cannot be helped unless he wants that help. Good luck to him at being emmancipated. He must show maturity and some way to financially support himself. Smoking pot and skipping school does not show that, and courts will NOT look kindly on that. Report him missing as he is not iwth you where custody orders say he should be. That covers YOU from reports of neglect etc... in case this other family gets the brilliant idea of suing you for support for him living in their home. A friend here got sued for that recently because her daughter decided she wanted to live with her boyfriend and his mom. The support was denied as the daughter has a home with her mother, just doesn't want to live there. The boyfriend's mom lets them share a room sans birth control (cause that goes against God's plans for procreation, don'tcha know? - and yes the mom said that in court!!!) and drink and smoke and use all they want and the girl's mom won't let the boyfriend go into the bedrooms or let them smoke or drink alcohol or use any drugs or watch porn. Gee, is it any wonder the court said the mom not only doesn't have to pay support but that the daughter is supposed to live iwth mom and not the boyfriend. not that the cops will enforce it, but . . . The judge was furious about the 'God's plan for procreation' koi though - his rant was pretty good but made no impression on the boyfriend, the daughter or the boyfriend's mom (how is it okay with God for the kids to use drugs and watch porn??? but not to use birth control? some people make no sense!) Anyway, file a missing person report, then file harrassment/stalking charges against your ex as often as you can catch him. Change the number on your phone and let him email you. The cops in your area are not as likely to be influenced by your ex, so hopefully that helps you. Your area DV shelter will provide therapy to you as a survivor of DV and as someone being currently abused by an ex domestic partner - the stalking etc... are still DV and they will provide free therapy. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE take it. Trust me, it will make you a better and stronger and happier parent and person and it will help your daughter. Take your daughter to therapy also - it will help her avoid violent relationships and abusive patterns and of course that is what we all want for our daughter's! For your son, he knows that you love him and have rules bc you love him. Unless he ill abie by the rules, he can support himself. He won't find it easy and in a short time the new family will get tired of him. I have seen it here over and over. their true colors always emerge and the new family gets tired of the freeloading. Your ex's lies will emerge also, and if they don't, well, you don't want them as friends, do you? I am glad you found us, but sorry you need us. [/QUOTE]
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Need help with my 17 year old son
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