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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
need help with my spouse putting his foot down on his son
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<blockquote data-quote="AppleCori" data-source="post: 668915" data-attributes="member: 16024"><p>Hi and welcome, VMS</p><p></p><p>It adds another layer of difficulty to the situation when you are a step-parent to a young adult Difficult Child who is living in the home and is an addict. I experienced much the same thing.</p><p></p><p>The most important thing is to get 'on the same page' with your hubby. Present a united front. Have dad handle the confrontations.</p><p></p><p>My hubby was initially focused on getting his Difficult Child to finish a 2-year college program so that he would have a skill and could get a good job before he left home. He put up with a lot of behavior problems, broken rules, drug use, and disrespect before he finally realized that it was a bad idea to allow his son to get away with behaving this way. in the end he never even came close to passing his classes and it caused a lot of problems in our relationship.</p><p></p><p> It is unlikely that your step-son will change as long as he is allowed to live in your home while behaving this way and you are supporting his lifestyle. I mean, why would he change? He has no incentive to change. Things are going his way.</p><p></p><p>Talk with your hubby and have him set down rules that your son must follow. He must be willing to enforce them, though. He must have consequences.</p><p></p><p>Stay with us.</p><p></p><p>Apple</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="AppleCori, post: 668915, member: 16024"] Hi and welcome, VMS It adds another layer of difficulty to the situation when you are a step-parent to a young adult Difficult Child who is living in the home and is an addict. I experienced much the same thing. The most important thing is to get 'on the same page' with your hubby. Present a united front. Have dad handle the confrontations. My hubby was initially focused on getting his Difficult Child to finish a 2-year college program so that he would have a skill and could get a good job before he left home. He put up with a lot of behavior problems, broken rules, drug use, and disrespect before he finally realized that it was a bad idea to allow his son to get away with behaving this way. in the end he never even came close to passing his classes and it caused a lot of problems in our relationship. It is unlikely that your step-son will change as long as he is allowed to live in your home while behaving this way and you are supporting his lifestyle. I mean, why would he change? He has no incentive to change. Things are going his way. Talk with your hubby and have him set down rules that your son must follow. He must be willing to enforce them, though. He must have consequences. Stay with us. Apple [/QUOTE]
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need help with my spouse putting his foot down on his son
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