Need important advice!

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by IT1967, Aug 17, 2013.

  1. IT1967

    IT1967 Member

    I cannot believe this has happened. difficult child 1's year in school last year was horrible. One huge problem for her was a girl that caused difficult child 1 to have many breakdowns. We had MANY meetings with-the guidance counsellor, who tried (unsuccessfully) on many occasions to mediate a truce between them. Of course the teacher knew and so did the principal. She's moving into 5th grade, a new school. There was a form we could fill out to explain our kids to help with-the transition. And there was a space to list the name of someone you did NOT want your child to be with. I wrote this girl's name down. They put them together!!! My daughter is beyond distressed. I'm devastated about this. This is going to be a nightmare. I'm of course planning to call the school on Monday to talk to the principal and beg to have her switched. I'm panicked about that, because I've never heard of any kid getting switched after placements were made. I had had such high hopes for this school year. difficult child 1 has been doing so much better. I thought this principal got it - we talked more than once about difficult child 1. I'm sure it was an oversight, but I am very worried this could pretty much ruin her year. We have a 504 plan. Of course there was no specific restriction put in there that difficult child 1 shouldn't be placed with-this girl. Do I have any type of argument to make here that may give me some more support for switching her. I'm truly sick about this. I don't know how I'm going to make it through this weekend until Monday when we can call the principal.
  2. IT1967

    IT1967 Member

    Do you think if I had a letter from difficult child 1's therapist that she shouldn't be with-this girl, that might help? We see her on Monday. difficult child 1 and I have had discussions with-our therapist on more than one occasion last year about this girl. I think she would support us in this.
  3. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    I'm in Canada... different system. But here, schools tend to put more stock in a "professional" opinion than a "parent" opinion. I'd gather all the support I can... including any support you can get for making the switch to an IEP.
  4. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    There was one year one of my kids was terrified of one child and just talking to a kindly principal got her switched to another class. Bullying is such a big deal now...I would give it a try. Be very nice and see what happens before you do anything else. If it doesn't work, you can try the psychiatrist. That was my only experience so I'm not sure how it will work out for you, but it wasn't even hard to do for me. They had two was not a big deal. Be sure to use the word "bullying" in there.

    Don't anticipate a fight on this until you have one. Then, if necessary, bring out the Big Guns and their recommendations.
  5. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    We had a situation like this when difficult child was in 4th grade. Fortunately the teacher was very observant and was instrumental in getting the boys separated In this case, I would ask the therapist to write a letter, pick it up yourself, and hand deliver in person to the principal.

  6. IT1967

    IT1967 Member

    I'm happy to report that they switched difficult child 1 to a different group! Huge relief. I can't help but be grateful that we found out before school, because I have a feeling it would've been much more difficult and disruptive to have to deal with after school started. You can never let your guard down for one moment!
  7. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Glad you got this all worked out before school started. This year we had a situation where the school put my oldest daughter in a totally awful class for her. They stuck her in a class that would have substitute teachers during the year, differing ones. This would be bad for her because she needs a good stable person in her class. Thankfully her mom was able to get her changed when she first heard this and my granddaughter met her new teacher the other day and seems to like her.
  8. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    So glad this was worked out. At our school we work really hard to avoid matches that are not in the best interest of the school and changes are made at times.
  9. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Glad things got worked out -- a positive start to the school year makes all the difference!