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General Parenting
Need support regarding my sons
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<blockquote data-quote="smallworld" data-source="post: 27475" data-attributes="member: 2423"><p>Welcome! I'm glad you found us. Many of us have stood in your shoes, and we understand the issues you're facing. You're not alone any longer.</p><p></p><p>I don't think it's helpful to blame yourself for what's going on with your sons. And I'd wager a guess it's not because you're being too soft on them. It sounds to me as if your sons have issues that need an accurate diagnosis and then the proper interventions to help your sons cope.</p><p></p><p>Sorry for all the questions, but your answers will help us help you. How do your sons do in social settings and with peers? Do they have any speech or developmental delays? Any sensory issues (for example, sensitive to loud noises, seams in clothing, food textures or tastes)? Any mental health issues or substance abuse in the family tree? </p><p></p><p>In terms of your older son's anxiety, it is real and he's not refusing to participate on purpose. Anxiety is paralyzing. He may have every intention of wanting to learn to swim, but his fear gets in the way of his intentions. Depending on how much his anxiety interferes with daily functioning (and depending on what other issues are present), he may well need therapy and/or medications to help him cope. </p><p></p><p>One book you should get your hands on is The Explosive Child by Ross Greene. It has helped many of us on this board parent our extra-challening children. There's a thread at the top of this page about how to adapt the techniques to younger children.</p><p></p><p>Weekends tend to be slow around here, but others will be along soon to offer their advice. Again, welcome.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="smallworld, post: 27475, member: 2423"] Welcome! I'm glad you found us. Many of us have stood in your shoes, and we understand the issues you're facing. You're not alone any longer. I don't think it's helpful to blame yourself for what's going on with your sons. And I'd wager a guess it's not because you're being too soft on them. It sounds to me as if your sons have issues that need an accurate diagnosis and then the proper interventions to help your sons cope. Sorry for all the questions, but your answers will help us help you. How do your sons do in social settings and with peers? Do they have any speech or developmental delays? Any sensory issues (for example, sensitive to loud noises, seams in clothing, food textures or tastes)? Any mental health issues or substance abuse in the family tree? In terms of your older son's anxiety, it is real and he's not refusing to participate on purpose. Anxiety is paralyzing. He may have every intention of wanting to learn to swim, but his fear gets in the way of his intentions. Depending on how much his anxiety interferes with daily functioning (and depending on what other issues are present), he may well need therapy and/or medications to help him cope. One book you should get your hands on is The Explosive Child by Ross Greene. It has helped many of us on this board parent our extra-challening children. There's a thread at the top of this page about how to adapt the techniques to younger children. Weekends tend to be slow around here, but others will be along soon to offer their advice. Again, welcome. [/QUOTE]
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