New and Frustrated

[HopeRemains]

Insane- I replied once, but it didn't post, sorry. Thank you for the link. I have no idea where to start looking for a good psychiatrist, this one is failing. I'm hoping that this new therapist we get will be able to give some guidance.

 

[STRESSEDTOMAX]

I have felt like a prisoner in my own house for about seven years now. I have resorted to calling the police many times but now I try not to because it doesn't help. Usually it leads to a hospitalization, which, in turn, leads to nothing. I used to lock myself in a room and try to ignore him because he seemed to feed off of my attention but now that doesn't work either. One time I did that I had baby powder covering my entire house. Now what I do - right or wrong - is restrain him. I refuse to sit back anymore and watch him destroy my house. Like you say, though, how much longer will this work? He's 5 1 and 150 lbs. If my husband's at work, I call him too but, again like you said - it takes time for him to get home. No one can imagine how hard this is day after day after day...except the people here...welcome...but sorry you have a reason to be here...

 

[HopeRemains]

Stressed- I understand completely. When I have taken my younger and myself to my bedroom a couple of times (because he feeds off of the attention, too, and just to get my younger away from it) difficult child has made it his mission to either stand at the door yelling or pounding, or just to slam the door open and stand there staring hatefully at me and insulting me. He does not take "No Attention" for an answer. It is disheartening that the police calls haven't helped, as I've thought of those as aces in the hole for when things get out of hand.

 

[BusynMember]

You have gotten some excellent advice, but there is one more factor that might be huge in this.

If mom was a meth addict, did she use drugs and drink while she was pregnant? This is devestating to a developing fetus and usually causes lifelong problems that include behavioral and learning issues. I adopted a boy, now eighteen, whose birthmother used drugs and drank and he had behavioral and learning issues because of it. Alcohol can cause organic brain damage.

Most of the time our kids are complicated and more than one thing is going on. Although you can't fix the damage caused by prenatal drug/alcohol use, it helps to understand it and to learn strategies that others w ho have similar children use to help the child and yourself. Kids with fetal alcohol spectrum issues sometimes can not learn from discipline and need to be watched all the time to keep them out of trouble.


I agree that a neuropsychologist (who is familiar with children with pre-natal drug exposure, is the best way to go. There is nothing you are doing wrong and you should not blame yourself at all. If there is blame at all, sounds like that's one for bio. mom.

Take care and keep us posted.

 

[HopeRemains]

If mom was a meth addict, did she use drugs and drink while she was pregnant?

We don't know for fact, but husband is pretty sure that she did, looking back (meth). They were young when they "hooked up"; he didn't know her well at all. He didn't know she even had a problem until 3 months after difficult child was born, even though they lived together the majority of the pregnancy. We know that she did with her two subsequent children. By then the drug use showed badly. I'm glad you brought it up, because I am always surprised when professionals seem to place no real importance on that.


I agree that a neuropsychologist evaluation is needed badly. I am so excited to begin with this new therapist, and possibly get some referrals for that and a new psychiatrist!